I'm new here and I'll be honest.

I'm Kate. I'm 27 and have been picking at my skin and scabs and blemishes (anything that is even slightly raised on my skin) for as long as I can remember. I'm sitting here on the forum tonight scratching off every new scab that I acquired while at work (where I don't pick as much, of course). I've known for a long time that this has been an issue and I've even brought it up with my psychiatrists and psychologists and therapists (whoever I thought might be able to help) in the past, but nobody has ever really done anything for me. They've treated my depression, but not the dermatillomania or CSP. I mostly target my back/shoulders/neck area, but I'll attack pretty much any part of my body. I do my best to avoid triggers...mirrors or seeing my own bare skin are big no-nos. But I can't avoid them all the time...and even when I do, there doesn't go a day where I don't scratch and pick. I've been trying to be more aware of it, because I do it without thinking sometimes, and I realized that I probably scratch or at least feel for bumps/blemishes/scabs min. every 10 minutes or so. If I don't pick immediately while I'm doing, I might just lightly scratch my arm or something without tearing the skin. I do that around other people pretty often. It's gotten to the point where I'm almost afraid to be alone, because I know I'll start up--I scratch before bed, when I wake up in the morning, in the shower, in front of the mirror before washing my face, in the bathroom at work even. Anyway. I've kind of gotten a bit of inspiration earlier this week and I will be calling my therapist's office tomorrow to set up an appointment to discuss this issue specifically. I hope I'll get somewhere. I've been trying to quit picking for so long it feels like I'll never stop.