scab picking skinpicker -help

What the heck is wrong with me?? I actualy just picked a large painfull scab off of my leg then smeared the blood around that spot and right after I did it I felt I sense of relief? Ugh am I some kind of freak or somthing? This is so confusing to me.. sure I don't eat my scabs like most scab pickers but perhaps that's because I am a vegitarian and meat or any sort of animal biproduct gives me the shivers. Also no part of my body is free from picking, fingers to toes to lips and hair....I feel lost and scared by this thing I can't control. Its awfull to have to hide your legs in the summer because of scars...ugh. and to realise I've been doing this ever since I was a child doesn't give me hope for posative change.