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turnedthecorner , 05 Oct 2010

healing:) R u?

I'm healing... I've been picking my skin for about 15 years now and I'm finally getting better. I'm in cognitive behavioral therapy, and I'm learning to resist the urge to pick! Tonight I had an episode, but instead of beating myself up about it, I found this site. I'm trying so hard to stay strong and resist the temptation to pick. This is cathartic to write... I would love to find more people on this site like me who are determined to stop picking at themselves. Perhaps we could support each other??
32 Answers
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turnedthecorner
October 17, 2010
Your rants are always welcome here:) I like blogging way better than journaling... it's nice to know that someone can hear you! I love the tip you gave that you learned in DBT. Please share more!! I truly believe we can eradicate this behavior from our lives. We have a choice!
lilrhodap
October 17, 2010
Thanks! Sometimes I really worry that I will never eradicate it unless I actually cut off my hands or something. It comes and goes, as far as how bad it is, but I've never been a even a year episode-free. And the older I get, and the more times it happens, the more estranged I get from my family. When I pick my number one priority is that nobody in my family finds out. And I've had two bad ones in the past two months. Right now my face looks like it was burned with acid. But coming here is a great way to calm down, move away from the shame, and NOT pick. I'm so glad you liked the DBT tips! I am more than happy to post more, because the packet is huge and it is all about ways to NOT do a destructive behavior. Lots of ways, so there is something for everyone. But the entire DBT program can be prohibitively expensive, or hard to find locally. I will see if I can locate the packet itself, and just post the file up here for people to look at for free. If the site owner can't do it, for legal reasons, maybe I can post it on another page and put a link. For whatever it's worth, I am always interested in healing tips. One of my worst problems is that when I have an episode, it happens in one evening, and then I am sort of housebound for a couple of days, so I have to try to use whatever I happen to have around to clean and heal it. Darn it. I think I'll hunt around and see what people have posted.
misstanya
October 21, 2010
wow.... talking about not having control over ur hands hit me hard.... I just cannot stop... EVER... its really weird too, cause both my sisters have the same problem... I just cant control it... one of my sisters even yelled at me one day cause she said my legs looked like I had chicken pox... all the red marks... cause I had to wait on her at the store... just cant be left alone and bored... even if i feel something remotely weird i pick it... I even have moles that I forget are there... i just feel the lump from them and have to go look to see if its something I can pick... im 29 and should be used to them, but im not... I hate this... im at the point where if I cannot find anything to pick, im grabbing fleas off my dog and popping them... wtf? I feel like crap everytime someone points it out, but still cant stop... ;((
turnedthecorner
October 26, 2010
I'm 29, too.... which only makes me more ashamed that I can't get a grip on this behavior (eventually I will)... I keep telling myself when I turn 30 I'm no longer going to do this, I will stop. That's my birthday wish this year to stop picking (good thing I have until april)... The waiting thing is tough for me to when I'm being idol. Hand toys are good... I have magnets that I play with while I'm driving, it helps.... knitting is a good hobby to take up as well.
michigangirl
November 19, 2010
my psychiatrist told me to start knitting. he said.. "i don't know if you're a knitter".. and he laughed. even he knew he sounded goofy. i'm 20. knitting doesn't really appeal to me. i've taken up other hobbies, like cutting coupons for soldiers and such.. volunteer stuff.
Want2bfree
November 19, 2010
Thank you so much for those tips...I will give them a go. I've learnt to control my picking by using my will power...thank god I'm a Taurus lol we can be stubborn, but it can work to our advantage!! I told myself that my skin would look better if I didn't mess with it and if I went to bed without picking I would feel sooo much better in the morning. I even have phases were I don't even feel the urge to look in the mirror first thing in the morning. Also, the times when I do go to the mirror I just look at my skin and maybe squeeze/scratch lightly at a couple of blemishes and then say to myself that's enough and go do something else. Hope this helps someone....I feel your pain...love to everyone xo
Justmejeannie
October 21, 2010
Am a housefire victim, I was burned over 38% of my body. Basically arms, hands and torso... My picking began because of the scars healing... now I can't stop! From head to belly button, I now have approximately 20 scabs I can't stop picking!
Justmejeannie
October 21, 2010
Am a housefire victim, I was burned over 38% of my body. Basically arms, hands and torso... My picking began because of the scars healing... now I can't stop! From head to belly button, I now have approximately 20 scabs I can't stop picking!
here.I.am
October 26, 2010
Hi, I'm new and am not really sure what to say exactly except that I have been picking my skin for 15+ years and only now, through "google" research of my own found this site and a validation for my years of unknown CSP. I too have been to numerous doctors, dermatologists, etc and have been prescribed meds for acne and anti-anxiety eventhough I knew I did not have acne. Ive been on every anti-biotic for acne (oral and topical) and then some (sulfa drugs-which only gave me massive migranes) yet my "acne" didnt go away...hmmm...maybe its NOT ACNE?! Right, its Dermatillomania. Obviously we all know not to pick, plenty of the people we are surrounded by "remind" us of this constantly yet I think that makes my picking worse. Right now I have two large open sores on my face and two on my back and am on clyndomiacin (sp?). Eventhough I told myself during my last episode (which resulted in the biggest picking spot I EVER had) that I would never do that to myself again, alas, here I am. I am always interested in ways of healing for infections, open spots, and so on. I have tried A LOT of things but have yet to find a very effective process. Any suggestions that have worked for others? Many Thanks.
turnedthecorner
October 26, 2010
Hi... I hear you. I'm happy you found this site. I'm sorry to hear you have the sores on your face and your back. I don't have any advice on how to heal the sores, but I'm sorry your anxiety was so high that it manifested physically in this way. Sending you lots of light and love and know that you're not alone.
turnedthecorner
November 19, 2010
I've met someone dating-wise and he's really nice. He's asked me to go to Las Vegas with him for the weekend and my initial thought was, "oh no, my skin!" Believe it or not I came home and picked at three small blemishes on my arm which are now scabbed. Luckily, we postponed the trip for another 2 weeks so I'll have sometime to heal even more. I'm doing waaaaay better than I used to be, but every now and then I'll get trapped in the zone of obsessive analyzing over every little flaw on the back of my arms which usually leads to at least one attack on one little bump which at the time of anhialation seems absolutely enormous and disgusting! Oh the woes of body dismorphia, anyway, that's getting better, too. My point is, I have 2 weeks before I have to be in a bathing suit and well I'm hoping I can refrain from mutilating myself in the meantime. The appearance of my scarring has gone done dramatically, what bothers me now is the texture. The skin on the back of my arms is bumpy and in some places the dried up skin is rough... not very sexy lemme tell ya. We were together two nights ago and he asked me, "Why do you have a bump on your arm?" (He felt it through my long sleeve tee). I went into my normal monologue about Keratosis Pelorisis, Leaving out the part that the keratosis isn't the real problem rather it's that I can't control myself from picking at it, but alas he continued to joke about the ghastly idea of keratosis in his attempt to flirt with me. I tried my absolute best not to get defensive. I'm really hoping my arms will be smooth by the time we take the trip. Wish me luck!!

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