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40 years of picking
Hi i am new to the site and wanted to share my story. I have picked my skin from the age of about 3, also have Trichotillomania (Hair pulling), Generalized anxiety and mild depression. I had the nick name of Pickylangzam (picky slowly) as a child my mom used to call me this back in the 70s looking back parents didnt intervene or get me help that i needed but i guess they didnt really know the extent of my neurosis. I am now 40 and 2 years ago was diagnosed with GAD, anxiety, head injury trauma and depression. Throughout my life i have had a lot of triggers, deaths, tragic situations, stress upon stress but i would love to know why i started skin picking. i think looking back it was for attention, i also used to bite my tongue, still do, i feel it is very comforting. I pick most of the day, if i am not doing anything, currently i have no eyebrows!!! not nice at all but i do find it comforting. If i have a clear face, no spots that i have excavated myself so lovingly, its a good day, once i also had an earring so tight on my ear that it dropped off taking half my ear lobe with it...i think i liked the pain it made me feel human and normal. I am now nearly 41, take mild antidepressants and feel OKish but have anxiety most days and my stress levels are through the roof. I would love to find out why i use these OCD/compulsive behavoirs and would love to stop them, without medication. i now work as a therapist/healer as i cannot manage to be aroudn people in an office anymore. mind you i didnt enjoy that anyway. so that is my story, sorry if its horrific in bits but i thought i had better share. when picking i have to get right under the skin at pimples and blemishes and excavate them so i am left with deep holes in my skin. i recall my grandmother used to pick her skin and create big ulcers so perhaps its hereditary but i cannot help feelign there is some underlying cause that can be got to and healed. any advice greatly appreciated. with love tammy x
In reply to Hi Tammy and welcome. I just by kbennyl