I really hate this...

First of all, I'd like to say how glad I am that this site exists. I'm nineteen, and I have been struggling with picking my acne compulsively since 2007. When I really take a step back and look at how destructive picking has been to my life, it's startling. I realize that I'm constantly thinking about the condition of my face (to varying degrees, especially in social situations). It's honestly caused me to not enjoy life nearly as much as I could be. I look back on all my memories from high school- and realize that picking influenced ALL of them negatively in some way. For a long time, I put up with acne. I hated it with a passion, but I figured that it would eventually just go away. Here I am almost four years later, with a scarred up face and a broken spirit. I get really angry now. It's the sort of rage that I only feel in that situation. Everyone knows the feeling... you step back from the mirror after a session of picking and think to yourself, "My gosh... what have I done?". That feeling of absolute furiousness, frustration, and helplessness that comes over you when it settles in that you've just fucked your face up badly. This feeling increases based on the amount of time you've successfully been able to abstain from picking. So many times I've said to myself, "This is the last time. I never want to feel like this again." I might hold off for a few days... but, the urge comes back. I might be sitting watching TV, and my fingers make their way up to my face. Unconsciously, I start picking. Then, I catch myself- I say... well, I'll just pick this one zit and be careful about it. But, as anyone here knows, it never happens that way. I keep picking until I reach the point of no return. I say to myself, "Well... I've already screwed my face up this much, might as well keep going." It really is the most difficult thing to deal with I can think of. It hurts... No one can know how much it hurts until they've experienced it firsthand. It's a seemingly inescapable cycle. That's why I'm taking a stand. I need help though. I never talk to anyone else about my skin picking... I just bottle it away. That changes now. I hope that fellow sufferers will share what they know about the road to recovery. Also, I long to help others with this condition, because I really do understand how if feels. I'll be praying for everyone on this forum tonight. We can conquer this stupid disorder. Who's with me?