new/thinking

hi all - i pick at a scab on my chin a lot. after thinking about this, i realized i've been picking on and off my whole life. i.e. my chin - since february, and before that almost all of my senior year of high school. for a while in 4th and 5th grade i picked a scab on my earlobe. and for a little bit (i apologize, this seems gross and to be honest, i am very ashamed of these things) i pulled out individual strands of my hair when i was pretty young because looking at hair up close, i remember, fascinated me. i also have been picking my lips for as long as i can remember, since very early childhood. there's this strange comfort that comes from it. it hurts, but i like the roughness, almsot against my fingers. i can also remember as a very young child, gathering rough pieces of fabric between my fingers and liking the way the sharp-ish fabric edges felt in my hands. i've been reading this website and a lot of the things resonated with me: -the way pickers might have been bullied and maybe picking is a way to have control -face picking as a way to express low self esteem and even though it's highly visible, it's very unlikely anyone will out-loud acknowledge it. -anxiety/depression common amongst pickers. i am diagnosed as having an anxiety disorder, and i do take medication for this, but i have never discussed these picking behaviors with the therapist i see because it just seems so WEIRD. anyway, if anyone could share ways they help cope with the urge to pick at skin and lips, i'd greatly appreciate it. also, i'd also appreciate if anyone can share why they might find picking comforting? it would help me define that for myself. best to you all.