if you won't stop now you'll never stop

Hi everyone! I come from Poland and I pick my skin occasinally since I was 13 the time when my problems with skin started. I'm now 30 and I live in Florida. I hoped that by relocating from place where you usually cover your body most of the time to a place when u can enjoy a beautifull weather all year round will motivate me to stop. Unfortunatelly...I'm an atractive girl but my problem areas are my face and back of my arms. My sister lives across the globe and she does skin picking too, also on her upper legs. I believe that in my case this awfull habit is heridetary since my mom loves to scratch and i caught my father on digging in uncontrollbly. Of course like each one of you im very ashamed of what i do. So far so good though- no infection, scars only on the back of my arms which makes my life tought here in sunshine state. I own many elbow lenght cardigans in any given color that I constantly use to cover my arms. I remember that skin picking used to influence my life as a teenager- i would hide at home on hot sunny days or didn't want to socilize with peers. I did miss out on some good stuff because of it, but most of all i was and still am great at hidding it. For example if i had to wear a sleeveless dress for weddings or other occasions i would always put some skin tonned waterprof make up on it and then covered it with glitter or sth that nobody could tell. I also mastered covering up my face so it looks clear and natural. It's really hard to tell what sets me off; it could be either anxiety, stress, or just a boredom- when my hands start wondering like they had mind on their own, a sight of a pimple and immediate urge to pop it out! I tried leaving motivating notes for myself in a visible places around the house, i tried sitting on my hands, i tried motivation tapes, i tried trimming my nails very short (HELPS! for awhile), keeping myself busy and leave the house so i'm not alone with myself (HELPS!), covering problematic area whenever i'm at home (HELPS!), birth control pills with very little estrogen used to work like MAGIC! (they are not good for u in a long run). Meybe one day i ll get my arms tatood so i dont see the blemishes and I wont feel the need to pick them. It's definitely a sickness and it's wrong. It's a crazy cycle- u see sth or u feel bad- u pick- u feel guilty for what u just did- u pick some more and make it look even worse. Just BE HAPPY with who u really are. Don't think about it too much. You did it, it felt good, its still better than smoking cigaretts! Hope that u won't do it again. But if u do IT"S OK. Take care and good luck. If I find a way to fight it i promise to share with you.