Day 3: My Journey to Recovery

My skin is looking a lot better than it did on day 1, but I'm definitely not happy that I touched my face today. I ended up picking off all of the scabs below my eyebrows because everything was so dry and tempting. Then of course I had to pluck... I really shouldn't have! The only things that are really bugging me are 2 red spots along my brow bone (closer to the out corner of my left eye), and one red spot around the same spot on my right eye. For some reason there is a spot under my right eye that feels like a bump. I get that sometimes and I don't know why. It's not a pimple, it's not an ingrown hair, and it doesn't hurt. It's just a hard bump that doesn't have any redness to it. It will probably take at least a few days to a week to fully go away like they have in the past. I just really wish I would have waited and not touched my face. :( I know it's not as bad right now, but if I would have waited another day or two my skin could have been perfect after the scabs had fallen off. The corner of my left eye just looks so red right now! I'm taking a bartending course Monday-Thursday this week and I'm hoping to find a waitressing/bartending job afterwards for the summer. I'm currently a nursing student and I need to pay for school... My only problem is is that I know I won't look for work until my eyes are completely clear. I don't care what anyone says, in the restaurant business I would be less likely to be hired if I have big red gashes above my eyes. Even I know it looks disgusting, so what customer would want to see that? I really just want to feel normal again. This is affecting every aspect of my life and it has taken me a long time to realize that I can't live like this any longer. I'm literally driving myself insane. I can't wait for the day when I can leave the house without putting on makeup and feel good about it. I keep reminding myself that I need to keep my face clear for June 22nd because I'm doing an event called tough mudder. All I can say is that I am not doing an event covered in mud while I have make-up on! Right now this forum is my biggest support line and I thank everyone who reads my posts and responds. I hate feeling alone, and this is the closest I've ever gotten to finding people who know how I feel. It's a huge relief to talk to people on here and read other people's stories that are so similar to mine. Stay strong everyone. :)