frustrated and upset

Im a female in my 30s. Since I was little Id always pick at myself. I remember the place I used to pick all the time was my ear lobes and I blamed it on ear rings making my ears itch. That was at about age 6. Anyway I stopped for a long time. After I had my first child, I started picking again. On my scalp. I guess the past isnt very important ATM. Lately Ive been picking at my scalp a bit, but mainly on my ears. The upper part not the inner ear. Sometimes if I cant get a grip on the scab/dry skin, I will use a straight pin and place it under the scab but not far enough to make it bleed and pull up. It usually cuts it in half and I can grab an edge and pull. I try hard to make it so it doesnt bleed and if I feel any wetness, I can stop for a little while. Last night when I went to sleep, it was smooth despite the open wound. I woke up this AM and I was hurting and it felt crusty and I put off picking for a couple hours. Sadly all day long I have been picking. Ive used a pin 3 times per ear. Not bleeding or leaking pus, but I also cant grab an edge and pull it off. I am getting highly frustrated. Then I think about how gross this is and I just get mad. I have noticed I do this when Im tired, stressed or dont feel like I have control of a situation. I try and fix it but its hard and Im nervous to go see someone about it. There have been times Ive stopped mainly b/c my then BF and I lived together and I didnt want him to know about it. Im not really looking for advice, but I guess I kind of am. I just needed to vent and get my frustrations out. I hope eevryone else can find a way to stop their picking.