Sores and Shame

Hi All! I have been suffering from mild dermatillomania and severe dermatophagia since I was 4. At 22, I have just found out that there were names for my 'bad habits'. I've been hounded about biting and picking my entire life. I don't really know why I do it, I just do, and I HAVE to do it. The result is always the same - I'm left sore and bloody and I am so utterly ashamed of my appearance. I'm no therapist, but I assume my disorders developed because of my emotionally stressful childhood. Then three years ago, I had a car accident that introduced PTSD. Then, last Christmas my best friend was killed in a car accident. Since he died, my problem has spiraled out of control. The flesh on my fingers is completely raw skin. I discovered a cuticle trimmer in a manicure set a couple of months ago and I will spend 1 to 2 hours a day doing my own "mini-surgery" to remove every piece of dry skin, cuticles, callouses, you name it. I' will use any sort of sharp tool I can get my hands on - scissors, earring posts, thumbtacks......When I'm not doing surgery, I'm biting and chewing. I just stumbled across this website today as I was doing research. Reading some of your stories brought me to my knees, and now I truly know - this is REAL. This isn't a bad habit. This isn't weird. And there are other people like me. What a relief. I have considered seeing a therapist, but right now I just can not financially afford it. As a somewhat healthy holistic person, I refuse to see a medical doctor in fear of being prescribed some sort of anxiety or depression medicine. For now, a lot of my research has led me to a couple of different supplements that may help - I wanted to share these: Inositol, St. John's Wort, & Gingseng. If anyone has had any luck with these let me know!