1st time here... need to get some feelings out

I'm writing this right now because my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years wouldn't kiss me today before he left for work. I went in for the kiss, he avoided it. I am so hurt and embarrassed. He knows I pick my lips, but today they were bleeding, and he said, "I don't want to kiss bloody lips." That's perfectly understandable, but still hurt so damn bad. I've picked my lips to the point of bleeding for years and years. I have also bit my nails since I was in 3rd grade. I've tried stopping both picking my lips and biting my nails, but they only last a short period of time; no longer than a month tops. I just don't get it because I like when my lips are healthy and not scabby or red, so why do I go back to picking them!?! I don't think I do it at certain, specific times, I just do it. Anyways, I don't know if I'm looking for answers to these problems or what, but I just wanted to get these feelings out to people who, unlike my boyfriend, don't think I'm gross... thanks.