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ex-picker , 25 May 2013

An illegal drug helped me stop my habit of 19 years.

Hello all. I am in my mid-20s. For around 19 years, which means from ever since I could remember, I bit and chewed my fingertips. I had 2 or 3 cms lesions on my fingers, you could see bright red skin/flesh, horrible nails, pain. I also, to a lesser degree, tend to pick scabs off pimples and bite my lips. Pure MDMA - also known as the street drug "Ecstasy" - provided my with the insight necessary to put an end to the lifelong habit of finger biting. I was ashamed of my fingers, ashamed of myself, had tried many times to stop, had tried reading about the issue, but nothing helped me. I felt helpless and totally dominated by this habit. After a couple of uses of aforementioned drug, I realized that while under the influence, I NEVER bit my fingers. NEVER. This led to the desire to break the habit once again. And so I did. I took the decision sober, after one MDMA session, and have not relapsed since. It's been more than 2 years. On all my other attempts, I couldn't go further than days. Please do not think this post is saying "go take some random illegal drug and be cured". NO. Please do not go into the street, buy some random s%#% called "ecstasy" and take it in hope of a magical cure. You can hurt yourself badly. But MDMA has been showing promising use in post-traumatic stress disorder treatment, for example. In my humble opinion, it could be a powerful tool to help with afflictions suck as dermatillomania. Be well.
3 Answers
sunshinefunk
May 25, 2013
You are brave to come out and tell us all about your experience. I think that illegal AND legal drugs all affect the brain, and we shouldn't rule them out. I have never tried ecstasy, but I have no doubt that it caused you to have a realization. Good luck to you and thanks for your story.
GraceInMiami
May 25, 2013
Be Careful Everyone!! Pure MDMA is extremely RARE.. What we know as Ecstasy is not pure mdma. It is ALWAYS cut or mixed with either heroin, cocaine, or some other ingredient. When I was younger, I experimented with this and I swear my picking got sooooooo bad. Basically, ecstasy (and even pure mdma) raises your serotonin level dramatically (which is what the euphoria is) BUT!! when you come down off of it, your serotonin levels are extremely depleted!! leading to extreme depression, irritability, anxiousness. I remember everytime I used this, I would Always end up infront of the mirror, and spend hours totally 'tranced' out, so much worse than when I didn't use it.
picker87
May 29, 2013
Hello, I'm new here. I'm 26, and when I was 21 I took MDMA. The first time totally changed my outlook on life.. I went from an anxious, negative stressball to a 'things will always work out', laid back person. I'm REALLY GLAD I had the experience as I think it helped me with some body issues and I deal with stress much better now which I think in turn leads me to pick less (not less frequently, but the sessions don't go on for hours in front of the mirror like they used to.. it's more in patches of a few minutes).

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