Picking gums 33 years

I have picked my gums for 33 years and can not stop. It started with string filing between my teeth. I would use the string to scrape the gums till the gums between were scraped out. Over the 33 years it has evolved. I now form a loop with string and file it between the teeth and loop it around the gums and yank the gums out. I will scrape the gums with anything sharp to make them bleed. I will use surgical blades to cut the gum and push finger nail into incision with the loop of the string sliding into the gum and ripping the gum between the teeth out. Ill use pens to scrape gums and push the gums up so I can rip more of the gums out. They bleed. I don't know why I do this. I can't stop. I love the burn of tooth paste on the gums but I go farther then anyone else does. I scrape gum till bleed the I use a water pic to soften the gum up. Then I rinse with listerine vinegar and baking soda and brush. I then brush with rubbing alcohol and then peroxide which makes the gums white. I then cut them or press my nail into the gums till there's a deep mark and then press nail in and slide loop ove fingered and between teeth and rip the gums out between the teeth. Then I rebrush with everything again I don't understand why I started at night laying in bed when I was younger and can't stop. I have never told anyone this. I am a freak. I' don't know what to do