I started picking at an ingrown hair on my vaginal area and have now picked it to a hole.

I'm 18 and have always had Trichotillomania type skin picking tendencies. Last night I got no sleep and now it is the next morning and I have had no sleep now for two days. Last night I started picking at a ingrown hair on my vagina and kept picking and picking. The more I picked the more the hole that I had creatted from picking got bigger. Something about ingrown hairs is like a manifestation to me. If I found one and am able to pick it out than I feel a sense of accomplishment. The more I tried picking out a tiny tiny hair that I don't even know was even there the deeper the whole became and the more I got angry and frustrated I started to just scratch and kept scratching away skin trying to get deeper deeper down to get the ingrown hair. I feel so weird and scared. I don't want a scar and I'm just ashamed of myself right now. I have to go work at 11 and becuase I was sitting on my computer all night I haven't slept all day. Im sorry of I'm coming off bitchy. Thank you for reading. If someone to talk to me I would really appreciate that.