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Treehopper , 28 Dec 2013

How do I have a relationship?

I have been picking my skin since I was about 13 years old, I'm 23 now so that's ten years of my life spent doing this. I'll pick anywhere, but my face is a primary spot and combined with acne, I now have quite a few dark marks on my face. I don't go anywhere without makeup and I never allow men I am dating to see me without. With makeup I am very attractive...without not so much. My question is, how will I ever be in a real relationship if I never let a man see me without makeup? I won't even let a man spend the night. What do I do??
5 Answers
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nastyab
December 30, 2013
Hi girl, Don't bee too hard on yourself. You are more beautiful without make up than you think. What helped me is wearing very little make up all the time (just concealed to cover up scabs and pimples). This way you will get used to being more natural. Meanwhile, check out some pictures on google of celebrities without make up. They have bad skin, dark circles, acne you name it. Ppl and their husbands/boyfriends still find them beautiful. Therefore, not wearing make up is not that big of deal. Ask some of your guy friends and they will tell you they don't mind their girlfriends taking her make up off. Try some of these tricks and let us know how it goes. Hang in there.
Treehopper
December 30, 2013
Thank you for that help! I am just too scared that once he sees the real me, he will find some other reason to leave me, even though the real reason is because I'm ugly. *Sigh* I just don't know how I will ever have a future with someone.
MysteriousSunshine
December 31, 2013
When I was newly dating my now husband, I would literally NEVER go without make-up. Even in the middle of the night or early morning I would get up and put some on. It became exhausting! Thankfully, as our relationship became more serious and I became comfortable I went with less make-up and eventually he saw me with none at all. We've been married now for nearly 8 years and I truly believe that true love sees through any flaws. As I now struggle with a health crisis and pending surgery, I realized how these flaws are so insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Best of luck!
Treehopper
December 31, 2013
If I may ask...how did you explain the makeup? Like did he ever ask early on to see you without? If he had, would you have let him?
MysteriousSunshine
January 02, 2014
He never asked about the make-up. If he had, it would have depended on my skin situation as to whether I would have shown him my bare face, or not. As pickers, I think that we are super sensitive about our appearance. Although, I honestly don't think that people care or realize exactly what we do to our skin. For the most part, I believe that my husband thought that I simply had acne. I didn't tell him the entire truth until a year or so ago. We've been a couple for nearly 11 years! It was a long time to carry such a thing and I don't recommend it. Once you're comfortable with your boyfriend, tell him. If he cares about you he will try to help your battle this. Good luck.

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