Help! Please.

I picked at my face after going months without picking to this extent. I squeezed and a clogged pore yesterday (which wasn't even red to begin with). The area immediately swelled up and turned red. I wasn't sure I got the 'core' out so I gave it another squeeze in the evening and got the remainder out.
I woke up this morning to a huge scab, which I would have been ok with except it appeared white in the middle. I wasn't sure it was just skin or pus so I managed to leave it alone all day until about an hour ago. I squeezed and nothing but clear fluid came out ( so I guess it was just skin). All the while, I managed to keep the scab intact with just a little hole where the fluid came from.
Now I feel so low. Like, next level low. I feel like I delayed the healing process, will end up with a worse off mark from it and can't understand why I'm just incapable of listening to my gut and leaving it alone. Has this happened to anyone? Did it interfere much with the healing if the scab remained intact? And how do I snap out of this mental rut?