Anyone else feel cursed for life?

Hi it feels good to know I'm not alone.. Sometimes I have hope for like 24 hours I think it's getting better and I can control it but the next day here I am covered of wounds, thinking it's impossible to ever stop..
Right now I am in one of those periods when I can't see anyone because my face is just so awful after a big breakout and I would just want to sleep non stop for like a week or two so my wounds could heal lol basically I'm depressed
Anyway feels good to share and maybe you will feel better knowing there is worse than you

Yes I completely understand what you're going through. Sometimes I feel like it's pointless to even try to get better because I'll eventually cave into the urge that's always lingering in the background. It also makes me feel abnormal, so I don't go out of my way to make connections even though I really want to make genuine life long friends. I also don't even know how to go about getting help, everything is too expensive and my parents don't take the condition seriously. I feel so alone and invalid. It has an abundance of other symptoms like anxiety, depression, shame, ocd, and they all take their toll on me too. I just desperately wish there was a way to stop and overcome it. It is becoming too much to deal with.

Hi,
Yes I know how u feel, sometimes I think I should stop fighting and just accept it and live with it, the moments my skin is better are only making the crisis look worse ! I've been trying to accept it but I can't, is it part of me or is it something I can get rid of ? I don't know anymore.
I can tell u I would give everything I own to get rid of it. If there was like a fucking cure I would give all my money without any doubt !! I feel like it's stopping me from living my life u know. But for now I don't even have enough money to see a therapist and I'm not even sure that would work anyway..

I hope you feel better today, be strong !!

Yeah I'm in the same boat as you with the therapist thing.... I would give anything to stop too. But I know it's something I do to escape the array of overwhelming emotions I experience regularly. I think we have to deal with the source of the problem and we'll find ourselves needing to pick less or not at all. I really hope we both find help somehow, and I hope you have a nice day too, I'm trying to stay strong, you should too!

I have not picked in a month. I got eczema and am visiting family in CA for two months. My urges are still there when I see something or especially when I feel tiny bumps on my skin. What I have been doing is quickly brushing the urges away and talking myself through them. Telling myself, it's a tiny clogged pore, it won't bother me so leave it alone. And then getting away from the mirror as fast as I can. Also what has helped me is switching my worry of clogged pores to fine wrinkles around my eyes. If I am obsessed about the wrinkles, there is no need for me to pick at my skin as the skin picking is not of any benefit agains wrinkles. So now I'm just getting into the routine of using retinol under the eyes and seeing the overall improvement over time. If I can focus on the wrinkles or any other part of my face that has nothing to do with acne or clogged pores, then I am simply relocating the obsession into something else. I have to outsmart the obsessions by tricking my mind in such a way. Living my whole life with OCD has taught me to manipulate my own mind in order to survive. Otherwise this crap can beat a person down.

Oh and also obsessive moisturizing has helped me. When I put on moisturizer I tend to leave my face alone because it feels like there is a layer of beneficial chemicals on my face which I should not temper with. Since picking usually ensues that I habitually have to wash my face, I am reluctant to pick and wash off all the beneficial and pricy moisturizer products off my face. This is another way in which I have been "conditioning" myself not to pick. Moisturizing has also helped to lower my breakouts. I moisturize both day and night on a strict regime.

Serene....glad to hear you've had improvement. What moisturiser are you using? Remember that washing does help with exfoliation, so once to twice a day (if wearing make-up is important.

I do wash my face twice a day...but I've been using Manuka honey in the shower as a face wash in the mornings when my face is clear of makeup. I use a scrub to wash traces of makeup off at the end of the day. In the past I have been obsessive and OCD about washing my face multiple times a day....so I'm trying to break that cycle. Every time I would get just a small amount of oil on my face I would be compelled to wash it off....which might have exuberated the eczema. So I had to change my behavior.
Recently I've used a prescription moisturizer called EpiCerum. It forms a protective barrier on top of the skin, which is ideal for dry winter weather during which it's common to experience eczema.
But I also have been using other moisturizers from the drugstore which are very beneficial for very dry skin.
Eucerin eczema relief cream works great on both face and body. It doesn't cause any breakouts for my skin and is very emollient and moisturizing. Also MG217 Eczema cream for face forms a thick protective layer over the skin. Both affordable and great products.
My view on moisturizers is that they do help skin in it's texture and tone, especially when used religiously....but they won't do much for indented scars or scar pigmentation. And it's the flat white scars that irritate me, as well as some of the slightly indented ones. With those issues it's best to combine moisturizing products packed with antioxidants as well as retinol & some other procedures such as lasers, peels, skin needling, vampire facials...etc. For scars and serious pigmentation issues there must be a whole arsenal of procedures that are undertaken over an extended period of time. Months to multiple years to see gradual results. That's the thing with skin, you must be extremely patient and expect to see good results after a few years of repetitive care. I remember I had good skin after three years of regular chemical peels...after which time I was able to get rid of most of the white scars by peeling them off. Then I stopped my regime, experienced new stressful life changes, started to pick somewhat excessively, and ruined my results which I worked so hard to achieve. :/ So I'm on a journey now to quit picking for good because I learned from this experience that even if I fix my skin, I am highly likely to mess it up again. Its a slow journey so far. But there is some progress and I'm trying to rewire my brain from not reacting to imperfections in the same manner. I want to convince myself that there is more to living than just following my urges, picking, and then obsessing about the healing. How have you been coping? Have you tried any new strategies or observed any changes in your behavior recently?

Also for a good moisturizer that isn't oily...I have been using Olay ProX Deep Wrinkle Treatment. I believe it has reetinol. I am also testing out Roc Deep Wrinkle Daily Moisturizer with sunscreen Broad Spectrum SPF 30. It also contains retinol. Have you tried these? I also want to order Nutrogena Healthy Skin Anti-Aging Perfector Spf 20, Retinol Treatment. It's applied like makeup...like a tinted moisturizer but it's actually packed with beneficial ingredients. https://www.beautypedia.com/skin-care-reviews/by-brand/neutrogena/Healt…

Hi...i can't use any SPF, so haven't used any products you're using. I had been using some of Paula's Choice, really like the BHA liquid and gel...find it doesn't irritate. I've since switched to La Roche Posay Toleriane... foaming wash, Ultra, eye moisture, night cream and Fluide. .truly, I love it 10 days of using it and am blown away that it doesnt have any effect regarding any new plugged or milia areas. I use their Ultra Miscellar water for sensitive skin for cleansing make-up, then Bye Bye Blemish for washing. My husband uses LRP wash, eye and Fluide. So far so good. I hope the summer has equal success.
The raised scars are the worst.....BHA is helpful to a degree.

Are you allergic to sunscreen ingredients?

Maybe not allergic, but definitely sensitive. My eyes tear constantly and i get a headache. I loathe the smell, and my mouth gets a weird feeling. That includes cosmetics with spf as well. Sucks, but I'm not in the sun anyway.