i’m tired of this

i’ve been struggling with skin picking for almost four years now, and i keep ending up in the same, pitiful cycle with its highs and lows. minutes ago i was using a nail clipper to rip apart and dig into this one spot after trying to set a timer to resist. i cannot keep myself accountable, and my therapist thinks i should do this since the people around me, as much as they try, just simply do not understand. i’m on medications and supplements and what not but i just don’t see the point if i’m just going to give up or give in. yes i’ve had my victories, but those look so small in comparison to the ugly scars and sores on my face that i have to see everyday. this is my last resort- i want to go to college without my parents worrying that i’m going to kill myself.