Glad I'm not alone

I have been picking at my face since I was 14 years old, that makes it 20 years now. Every tiny pimple, blackhead etc I'll squeeze and pick and pick not stopping till I've removed it even if it leaves me with a big bloody and sore hole in my face. So glad I've finally found somewhere where I can relate to other people about it, it ruined my teenage years and has ruled my life since. When I was younger I thought I was a freak and the only person in the world to do it, couldn't understand why I kept doing it again and again making myself so miserable. I have been OCD as long as I can remeber had lots of different anxiety relieving rituals but picking my face has caused the most stress because it's something you just can't hide. I became almost a recluse in my twenties hiding from friends and family, still don't like making new friendships can't deal with the added stress incase I make arrangements then have to break them if I have a bad skin picking day and end up looking hideous. I'm taking Prozac at the moment and take antibiotics daily for rosacea, don't know if I've developed rosacea because of all the picking, washing and different creams I used in vain to help heal the mess I've made of my face. It's something that's so hard to deal with, like it's out of your own control and because of the relief felt while doing it like a numb kind of trance. I don't think it's something I will ever be able to control but by sharing thoughts and ideas on how to avoid getting into the situation I want to finally stop feeling ruled by it. Don't think anyone who hasn't experienced it could possibly understand how soul destroying it is.