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I finally feel like im not alone!
I was sitting up last night, upset i had been picking again. Im going to be 30 in 2 months and my face and back are total messes. I thought ok ill have a look see if there may be some info online about this. I was SHOCKED at the fact there are sites dedicated to this. I like most of you felt soo alone and like i was the only one. All of my friends have gorgeous skin. I have been picking since i can remember, since i was little. And last night for the first time i realised my face and back arent awful cause i get bad acne, its because I pick!!! I feel like I finally get it. And if i can do this i can have a clear face!!! FINALLY!!
Today was my first day and lets just say I didnt realise how STRONG the urge to pick is. And because i am trying not to pick its making it 100x worse. I look like a mess again tonight. I really dont know how to not pick. Im going to have a look through the forum to try get some info. Im really depressed about it tonight. I went to sleep last night thinking i can do this, i wont pick, it will be fine. AHHH nooo... i cant control it. It drives me totally crazy. Tomorrow is a new day so hopefully ill do better. I cant live like this anymore. I hate going out in the day, knowing people are looking at the scabs on my face, (there is no way i would wear clothing where someone could see my back, im so paranoid). I even sit and cover my face with my hands. I really need to get this under control. Id really love to hear how people have gone overcoming this.
Its really horrible :(
April 26, 2010
welcome. i truly relate to everything you've written. it took a health scare to bring me to find this place and the information that is available on the menus here and in the topics is really helpful. there is an online book that is a heavy read at stoppickingonme.com and forums there as well. more and more sites are popping up online about this too. information is power. do read all you can and be very comforted in that you are not alone as you've found out. as you mull over things, think about your diet and your current skin care regimen and what needs to be addressed that way. there's so much that can be done to assist the process addressing those areas too. i did all that for myself and incorporated a lot of changes and then addressed the physical part which is a large part mental, by incorporating a lot of tactics to change the touching and harming part. i got serious and made a decision to be loving to my skin as opposed to harming which i knew i was in so much as i told myself i was doing the right things at the time i was harming myself. loving and caring is much healthier than harming. i've shared a lot of my tactics and approaches in topics here as others have. again, read and absorb as much information as possible to wrap your mind about how you will go about your personal journey conquering this compulsion. i believe it is possible, it is difficult, but possible. once ready with the necessary changes of your daily practices in place, join a challenge that others are in or create your own if the challenge seems to daunting. others will follow your progress posts and i believe you'll receive good support and advice here. again, i believe it is possible to overcome this and doing it with love and caring is what i recommend. you've likely been angry with yourself for too long. it's time to change all the things that will help the process. all the best to you and keep reading and posting !! <3 <3 <3