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picks9876 , 30 Mar 2009

Picking Others?

So, the other day I was standing by my uncle. For some reason I bumped my arm against his and noticed he had a scab on his arm. For some reason I really wanted to pick it, with the same amount of desire that I want to pick my own scabs, if not more. Luckily I resisted. About a year or so ago I had a cat who had scabs on her ears and I picked those off of her, instead of repressing the feeling. Has anyone ever felt this way?
44 Answers
ra1nb0wb00tay
March 31, 2009
definitely! i remember cuddling with my boyfriend at the time and rubbing his arm. There was a big scab on it..i found myself not leaving it alone and rubbing it constantly..it took everything in me not to pick it..he eventually told me to leave it alone lol. but its a very frustrating feeling. and when it comes to summer time and people get sun burns! i LOVE it when people start to peel..i'll act like im just being really nice and offer to help peel the skin off..but really im getting my "fix"
picks9876
April 01, 2009

In reply to by ra1nb0wb00tay

My grandmother has severe psoriasis. She constantly has peeling skin. That's just a fact of her life. When I was younger (from as young as I can remember up until 8) I'd pick it off of her. (She moved when I was eight.) I saw her again when I was 12 and couldn't stop. I haven't seen her in years now, but I know I'd start up again. For some reason she'd let me. I'm not sure why. Here not too many people get intense sunburns, so I guess I'm lucky, but I hate seeing people with huge scabs.
littlegrey1
February 19, 2012

In reply to by picks9876

It's my super-power. I see a zit and I just zone right on in. It's sometimes all I can think about. My mother-in-law has a giant blackhead in the middle of her forehead and sometimes it's hard to even make eye-contact with her, because I can't think of anything else but trying to get that blackhead out. It leaves me so frustrated. I come from a family of pickers (i am definitely the worst, and I pick everyone. My father, mother and brother all let me - sometimes even for an hour, but it really annoys my husband. I get rationed to one, maybe two zits. It's so hard. I try to sneak a zit through a cozy back rub with a little too much fingernail, but I usually get caught. It's so frustrating. I just pick - for the pop - I think. Anything I can find. Zits are the best, but fleas and ticks off the dogs and cats are great. Errant hairs are great too. I just love to pull out the hairs with the thick cuticles. I take the tweezers and pull out all my armpit hairs, my leg hairs, my husband's ear hair. I just can't stop. Once we even had a carpet beetle infestation and I crawled around the room for hours finding and popping these tiny bugs.
JustMe
April 10, 2009
I totally love to pick my husbands head while we watch tv and have a really hard time controlling the urge. He has humored me a few times and let me scratch his head; but lets just say he doesn't have near the pain threshold I do. One little bump on his head and no will power...got me a quick ticket to "don't do that again!" So yea, the urge for me is ALWAYS there. It's a very gratifying feeling. I could do it for hours.
run4fun
April 20, 2009
One time when I was 15, I caught my friend trying to pick a pimple on my shoulder. Ironically (considering my problem) I thought it was the weirdest and most disturbing thing ever, not that she wanted to pick it -I completely understood that (I'd been resisting all day), but that she actually went for it. Who knows if my friend actually had a picking problem? Doubt it. But I had a problem with my skin since I was a little girl, 8, for scabs. The pimple popping started at 13. At 19 I learned a whole new world of wanting to pick my boyfriend's skin. I always catch myself staring at and inspecting his skin. I see these little black heads that he can't even see and want to pick them. He lets me do it some times, but stops short. I'm more careful with his skin than mine, but I always want to pick it. It doesn't help that he has acne. He's asked me before "is it that bad?" and the truth is, "no, you look fine, but it's there and I want to get what's there."
Alameda
May 23, 2009

In reply to by run4fun

This is a big problem for me. I am very worried when I'm in relationships that my urge to pick my partner will seriously turn them off. I've been successful initiating a quick zit pop on a few of them here and there, but they've always started to get disgusted, then ban me completely when I can't just leave it alone. That's the thing - it's impossible for me to leave it alone! The urge is SO strong - I can't focus on what they're saying or what I'm doing all day if I see something I want to pop. I try to stop staring, try to keep my hands to myself. Most times I'm successful of course, but it makes me really frustrated and pent up inside, and I go to sleep with fantasies of getting at the offending spot running over and over in my head. One boyfriend once told me he had a boil on his ass that he finally got lanced, and I was so disappointed inside that he hadn't let me at it! From my perspective I'm just a picker, and a professional and a sister and a girlfriend and a gardener and all those other things in life. But when I'm stuck in a situation where I'm staring at a tantalizing stray hair on my bf's face and can't express it the picking part of my personality just feels all consuming. Then I fear that all the great parts that brought us together disappear in his mind as he associates me with flakes and blood spots, and he leaves to find someone "normal." To be honest, I don't want to stop picking. It's incredibly satisfying. I just want to live in a world where it's accepted. It feels desperately unfair that the only answer is for me to try to subsume something that I did not choose and that in fact is a habit that offers me solace and release in my most alone moments. But the shame and horror of wondering if people are noticing or staring is really damaging.
picks9876
June 01, 2009

In reply to by Alameda

I'm so glad you said that you don't want to stop, because I'm in the same shoes. Of courrse I'd like to stop so my family stops bugging me. My aunt, who I'm pretty close to, keeps telling me to stop itching. I just want to tell her I DON'T ITCH, I just want to pick. It feels good. Gosh, I even collect my scabs. It sounds so gross, but I do it, and stopping just seems horrific to me.
picks9876
May 25, 2009

In reply to by run4fun

How ironic. I was in a dance performance a few weeks ago, and we were doing a conga line. The guy in front of me had a pimple on his shoulder where I was to place my hand. It took so much for me not to pick at it.
mamma
May 28, 2009
wow, so I am not the only one. Not only to have have the obbsession and compulsion to pick my own body, I am addicted to doing it to other people too. All your stories sound so familiar. I can't get my mind off of it when my fiance has a pimple. I want to squeeze it so bad!
littlelady
May 31, 2009
i am the same way about the sunburns. it drives me crazy when people are peeling and i can't peel it for them. i actually used to get sunburned on purpose, which is horrible, I know, but i couldn't help it. I know it would result in me peeling, which gave me my "fix" as well.
picks9876
June 02, 2009

In reply to by littlelady

Ah, peeling sunburns are evil. I remember being, what eight maybe. My mom and I had been on vacation and I had burned pretty badly and by that time, was peeling. I'd peel it off and show her. I was so proud and she'd just shudder. I didn't understand why then. I still do it. THis past summer I burnt so badly my ears blistered then scabed after peeling. It was one of the best parts of my summer....the scab, the peeling--how sad is that? But the scabs were perfect and so was the peeling. It made me actually enjoy getting a sunburn.
limbo
June 02, 2009
ok, finally acknowledging the problem: that happened to me for about 6 months about a year ago, when i was under extreme amounts of stress--i had been illegally evicted twice and my now-ex boyfriend said it was my fault. i had irrepressible urges to pick at his face while we were in bed (he had a lot of in-grown hairs) and he let me do it (despite the fact that he should know better because he also has a neurological disorder related to ocd). it was awful and it made me feel even more disgusting that i already do for being unable to stop. i have since managed to move the picking away from the most visible parts of my body, for the most part, to places that are normally covered by clothes: my nipples (which have been a disgusting mess for about a year now) and my butt, though right now my legs are taking a beating too. I'm deeply afraid that I've caused permanent damage at this point, but i don't know how to keep myself from going for them. I think it's linked to insecurity and depression, and I do it most when I'm alone for an evening. It feels ridiculous, it feels like I should just be able to stop, but I haven't gone for more than a week without picking things, because at that point, it feels like everything starts to itch. I've tried substituting knitting, and I've tried cutting my nails down to the quick, but nothing has made it stop. It just gets worse and worse whenever I'm socially stressed out--I'm fairly certain it's linked to social anxiety, but I can't figure out why I feel like I need to pick even after I've had a great night out with my friends! I've gotten rid of all the crap in my life, but this is still going, and I've never been so frustrated with anything in my life. They're my hands, you'd think I'd be able to control them and keep them from ruining my otherwise fabulous breasts. I also bite my nails, pick at my scalp, pick scabs and eat them, pick acne, and I used to pick my nose as a kid. Disgusting. And no one ever told me this was a real disorder and there is treatment. They always just told me to stop, as if I hadn't told myself a million times. Also, side note: why is it that despite my significant skin defects, acne on someone else is an instant turnoff? a little self-hate in the works, perhaps? god, that's depressing.
julie123
September 10, 2009
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ldill
September 10, 2009
Does popping zits on my boyfriends back count? It drives me crazy & oddly it is fun. Guess kinda gross too. Huh.
want-to-heal
September 21, 2009
Yes, I do this to my boyfriend. Fortunately, he is understanding of my condition and sometimes picks a bit himself. Picking the skin of others and peeling the sunburned skin off others is ridiculously gratifying for me too. I wonder if it is kind of like the grooming that animals do; a twisted way of showing affection for someone!!?!
Thais dos Sant…
September 24, 2009
(I'm sorry, I'm brazilian and I don't know speak english very well. I'm sorry for my mistakes.) I used pick my ex-boyfriend too. I used pick his face and his back. At first, he allowed, and I was have fun for hours. Before, he began worried with the marks I left on his skin. Even his customers commented. So, he stops to allowed I pick him. I was very nervous, and fought with him because I knew that he allowed his mother and sister did that, but not me. I felt ridiculous, but could not control myself. Now, my current boyfriend does not let me pick him, and sometimes I have to take a deep breath not to fight him. Sometimes, I pick a few balls in the skin of my dog. He does not like and run away from me, and I take until he allow. I hate to do this, but I do. I'm afraid that this causes a problem with my dog, and I love my dog, but I do it anyway.
scarface
September 27, 2009
hi i am 36 and i am a picker. I was suprised to see so many other ppl with the same problem. I don't knw what to do anymore.
paula_2010
October 04, 2009
Wow. And I thought I was crazy/disgusting/weird/any other negative thing you can think of. I've never actually picked someone else but I get these weird urges to. I am so obsessed.
HannaRose
October 08, 2009
Omigosh! I thought that was just me!! I didn't know that a lot of other people did that, or had those urges!! I'll see a really nice, large, crusty and like, purplish scab, especially on one of my guy friends, and have such a hard time controlling myself. I'll see pimples on people, that are coming to a head, with a white tip you know, and just have the strongest urge to pop it!!! I find it kind of gross, but it's like an addiction and I can't stop. I just want more and more and more of the drug-my mind just keeps telling me to go further. I used to really love giving my sister back rubs, because I could always count on her having one or two pimples on her shoulders to pop, and it just made me feel so good, like an addict does after a fix. I'm incredibly tempted to pick my dog or my cat's scabs too, and am usually really disappointed when I can't.

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