It's not all about me, It's about control and how I feel about the world around me that I can't control

I am 44 years old and I have been picking for a very long time. All you youngsters out there listen up; It's not all about us in the way we think it is, it's about control. All the things that stress us out and make us feel bad leave us feeling like we have no control over our world, so we pick., because that is the one thing in our lives that we can control. We control when, where, why, how oftren, how much. It's like feeling pain deep down inside that we can't control so we find the one thing we can control, our own bodies. We choose how much pain is enough. no one is telling us to hurt ourselves, it is self controled, and not one person can help us except ourselves. We are in control of ourselves and what we do to our own bodies. It is a personal choice, and I feel like I have no control over it, but we do. It's just harder than anything else in the world to learn to control, our own deep down feelings. I don't know if I'm the oldest one who has found this site, but it has taken me years along with the internet to find all this out. You young people are lucky to have a place to express yourself. All my life I felt alon with this problem, I thought "It's just me, I'm the only one in the world that behaves this way. But there are hundreds of us out there. And yes, I believe that we can help each other with support and feed back. It is very important to the person sitting here expressing their hearts out and scared that no one will understand why we can do this to ourselves, except someone else with the same problem, even if it is for different reasons. So please don't leave people hanging when they log on, that makes us feel not worthy of even the smallest comment. We came to this site to express ourselves and look for answers or feedback of somekind.