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Trying to stop for real this time - help?
Commence long-winded post now:
Hi - first let me say I'm so glad I've found a forum like this. Somehow I just assumed I was the only crazy one doing this - and even after I realized it was a type of OCD, it took even longer for me to admit that what I was doing was really a problem.
I'm not exactly sure when I started picking at my face - probably sometime in late high school (I'm 20 now). I would use a small mirror at first to pop zits, and then also to squeeze at any pores that looked like that had anything in them. Later, I started doing this to the skin on my breasts, too. I only did this in private, and only when I could see the pores and what I was doing, so it wasn't an idle thing. Nobody in my life knew anything beyond that I had an acne issue, but it's so incredibly humiliating, and I was constantly angry at myself for how badly I had probably scarred myself, especially my cheeks, which look like minefields, and the tops of my breasts, which have some scarring. I'm not all that comfortable with my image anyhow, and this didn't help at all. I'd constantly promise myself that I'd stop and fail.
Anyhow, the reason this is in the past tense is that I've finally managed to stop for now - I threw out the mirror that I used, and since Monday the 25th, I've managed not to pick at my skin at all. I'm really proud of myself and I feel better already, but I keep seeing all these tiny zits or clogged pores and sort of running my fingers over them, thinking how easy it would be to give in just once - and I really, really don't want to.
So any tips on continuing to stop or advice on healing would be really helpful. I haven't much looked into the causes of this yet, but I'm planning to do it as well. And nice to meet you all!
In reply to Your story sounds similar to by Ang-eh