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rosie , 18 Feb 2010

40 Day Challenge! Count me in!

Hi everyone! I've been on this site for a year or two now, but I always just read the forum and don't contribute much... but, it's time that I finally change. I'm a 23 yr old Canadian and I've been a picker since grade 4. I'm studying to be a psychologist and I therefore have a lot of good info in my head about behaviour change and anxiety, but I've had such problem using the knowledge I'm learning! I've also been to a counsellor for my picking/anxiety probs, but I still never fully implemented what I learned. But I've picked for so long! Mostly my face and chest, sometimes legs/scalp. But I feel everyone's pain, shame, and anxiety. And I LOVE you all!!! I have my own housecleaning business and I'm always in houses alone, and of course that means I'm stuck cleaning bathroom mirrors... and it often goes bad for me. Today I was having a really strong day, I wasn't even paying attention to my skin! And then at the very end of the day I got anxious and picked at my face WAY too long. All alone in someone else's house. Isn't that weird? It's so stupid that I don't even care where I am! Anyhow, today is the end of this for me. This is the one-millionth and one time I'm quitting. And I always tell myself that I've tried everything to quit... and then my mom said that I had tried everything EXCEPT trying really hard. That hit home for me. Also, my counsellor told me that all behaviour changes (cognitive behavioural therapy) involve the ABCs (affect/feelings, behaviour, cognitive/thinking). So how it works for us pickers is that you must FIRST change the behaviours. You might not think you want to, and it might not feel good or right at all. But change the behaviour completely. Then, within days to a few weeks, your thinking (cognition) will change on it's own. You won't think about skin like a crazy person anymore! And then finally your feelings will change, and you'll feel all better about yourself and your new life. He estimated for me that the whole process until your feelings finally change is about 3 months or so after changing a bad behaviour. I hope this helps you all maybe. I'm also going to write some messages of motivation and encouragement on my bathroom mirrors and shower in candlelight. I hate having to wear makeup! I can't wait until tomorrow to start my new life! Good luck to everyone tonight! Please let me know how your 40 day challenge is going!!!
100 Answers
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horseanimal11
February 18, 2010
I ended up already having to start over- I accidentally picked at a blister on my foot and a weird skin splinter thing. Well, better luck tomorrow! I also thought of finding an alternate, positive habit- like pushing back cuticles and cleaning under fingernails (already used that one to stop biting my nails). That always seemed to help me, just wanted to share.
mf1st
February 19, 2010
I just found this site after picking my arm ...... and getting really mad at myself .. I know that a lot of it's a mental thing... and I know that we all need to encourage others and get encouragement ourselves.. so I know that it is hard... but it is worth not doing/picking in the long run. Just think that a week from now how much better you'll feel about yourself! so.... good luck!
wildflower
February 19, 2010
is there a place to hear from ex-pickers to hear how success was achieved? was it through talk therapy? drugs? positive conditioning? negative conditioning? cold turkey? substituting behaviour(s)? what worked? so many people are having a hard time making it through one day let alone 40. or a lifetime. i'm bandaged up for the night yet again and i can't say many of my sores went untouched. :(
wildflower
March 05, 2010
hey rosie and fellow canuck !! how is it going with you? i've just committed to the 40 day plan as i've made it to DAY 10 !! i too hate wearing makeup (never wore it before this awful affliction) and the necessity to wear it has already lessened considerably. i hope you are doing well with the plan as well as with your business and studies. let us know how you are! ((hugs)) to you.
40daysfromnow
March 05, 2010
My 40 day kinda fell apart yesterday. So I guess I should start at 1 again tomorrow. I'm printing off a 40 block chart to fill with stickers :P I feel like I'm 5 years old. Also, great idea with having the bathroom lit by candle light. I'm so doing that. Thanks everyone for your tips and support. This forum has been the closest thing to a cure for me so far.
wildflower
March 05, 2010
so sorry to hear you need to start over. :( whatever tactics help to keep you on track, by all means use them. i agree about this forum being extremely helpful. It's comforting and encouraging to know we are not alone in our efforts and it's a great place to learn from each other and support one another. best wishes to you and ((hugs)). and thank you for the note of congrats :)
wildflower
March 13, 2010
how's it going for you, rosie? how are your studies going? are you making any headway with your commitment to your 40 day challenge? for me, i'm on DAY 18! i have changed my behaviours and yes, my thinking has definitely changed. i feel kinder to myself. yes, your post was informational and very helpful. i, too, hate wearing makeup. i never wore anything other than mascara before my skin eruptions and the following picking and then "had" to wear it and hated it. yesterday, i went out in the world without any makeup on and felt great. no one gave me sideways glances (that i noticed anyways) or made comments. it was great. my skin's not perfect yet, but it's getting there and i'm sure not putting junk on it helps. i sure hope you are doing well, with everything; your resolve to be good to your skin, your business, and your studies. much success to ya, fellow canuck! :):)
40daysfromnow
March 13, 2010
Wildflower: How beaten up was your skin when you started your 40 days? Im on day 11 now and I'm not close to being able to go out without makeup. Some areas are ok to go without makeup but most aren't. Everything is healing and I have no bad sores after 11 days of not picking, but I still have lots of dark and red areas from where I picked before. How long did yours take to go away? I'm wondering if my skin started off worse than yours or if I can look forward to not wearing makeup in about 10 more days....? I think I'm going to post a photo of my face (blocking out my eyes) somewhere and post the link to the photo on here when I reach 40 days. This will give me incentive to be as kind to my skin as possible so my skin looks the best it can for the photo. Anyone else want to join me? Any ideas on where to put the photo to remain anonymous? Unrelated: I have gone through sooooo many candles now because I don't turn on the lights in the bathroom anymore. It's actually pretty nice. But it might get expensive. I average burning through 4 candles a day. But It is worth it. I would pay a psychologist much much more to help me, so the price of candles isn't too bad. So happy for you that you can feel comfortable without makeup. I can only imaging how good that would feel. Keep up the hard work! Only 2 days until 20! tip: wash your pillow cases AT LEAST once a week. Helps with heeling by keeping your face clean :)
wildflower
March 13, 2010
when i found this site i was wearing about 20 bandages on my face and neck alone per night. about the same number were required elsewhere on my body and could remain on longer than overnight as they were hidden by clothing. but the majority of the 20 face/neck bandages had to come off if i went out in public. i must say, though, i got desperate enough to heal some of them that i even left some on my face/neck when i went out, albeit they were not front and center but in less conspicuous locations yet still in view. some people made comments about them but i didn't let that get to me wanting more to heal than be concerned about vanity. right now, my healing spots that are still visible on my face are smallish and pink. there are about 12 and again, they are small but noticeable enough to be counted from a distance of 3' away. i had ones that were much more serious a while ago that would not look like these do, though, had i quit picking when they were at their worst. i had to seriously and aggressively approach healing those ones back then. that's when i began researching wound healing methods and natural topical antibiotics (since i'm allergic to neo and polysporin topicals and the like) and vitamins and nutrients that would assist me with the wounds i had at the time. getting them "over the hump" and healed spurred me on to research more even though i still picked. my skin was bad but not the worst it had been when i found this site and got on the bandwagon of addressing the self damage aspect. i suspect you've begun it with your skin at a worse stage but am positive your issues will lessen with each passing day. it's FABULOUS that you are on day 11 (i was still wearing makeup too) and that it's only been with the expense of candles !! that proves that this effort doesn't have to be expensive. it just needs committed focus. stay with it. you're doing great. soon you won't need the candles because when you look at yourself you will be looking with pride and care and love for your efforts and results. :):) edit: your tip is great - cleanliness is extremely important.
Manon Morin
April 20, 2010
I want to try this 40 day challenge. I have been picking my face for over 20 years. I need to start trying very hard to beat this terrible habit. I need to stop touching my face all the time. I do at work, in the car just about everywhere. I try to feel if I have any bumps on my face and then there is my bathroom or any bathroom mirror. I am taking this 40 day challenge. Thanks
Lara
April 21, 2010
hey everyone i just found this website today. After having someone ask me why i pick at my face today and being shocked that it was that obvious. i thought people just thought i had acne or exma. i think i thought that too. so i googled (thankyou once again google) "picking at skin" and all this info came up and i was shocked. I finally feel like I have the information and a name for it, and the knowledge that there are others out there who feel the same. I constantly pick at the skin on my face. Im 24 and have a lil acne but i pick at it and my pores til they are inflamed and bleed, i pick at my chest and scalp sometimes too. Usually i do it without knowing like watching tv or driving or even lying in bed (i may even do it in my sleep i think). I work on a boat and getting therapy isnt an option for me so this 40day challange is all i have. Im starting tomorrow Day 1. I will try visit the forum regularly and veiw everyones updates and post my own. WIsh me luck :-) Lara
Lara
April 21, 2010
So day 1 started today and im amazed at how often i reach for my face without thinking about it. I look in the mirror and instantly think about picking something, thinking about it i somehow beleive that my picking at it im making it look better, helping it heal, but actually in reality im making it worse, shouldnt that be obvious? I also find that i reach for my face every time i go to the toilet (sorry to be so frank) and if im making lists or working out accounts the urge to pick is almost overwhelming. Im going to cut my fingernails off today and ive unscrewed the fluro bulbs in my bathroom (seems to show up inperfections with them on). Day 40 is a long way to go
wildflower
April 21, 2010
yes, it is amazing when we realize the grip this compulsion has had on us. and incredible the distortion our justification for doing it has been. we've been in denial for so long and now, with awareness, it is astonishing what we've been doing as opposed to what we should be doing. and even more so, how hard it is to turn things around. but, it "is" possible to do it. with clear rational thinking, sound information, a good regimen, a plan, tactics, support and most of all determination, it is possible and so rewarding. take it one day at a time and 40 will creep up on ya !! just wait until about day 20 and see the rewards !!
Lara
April 23, 2010
hey thanks so much for the support, its so nice to have everyone doing it at the same time and at different stages. I am at day 3 now. I told my husband yesterday about what info i had found online and the 40 day challange. He was very supportive but not very surprised like i was. I felt a little deflated actually that he wasnt surprised. he said that its just given a name to something he knew was a problem all along. I cant beleive Ive been so blind in thinking that nobody really noticed and just thought i had "bad skin". Im excited to prove to myself that i have "good healthy skin". It might help drum it into me that the only reason i have "bad skin" is me. I am finding it hard to mosturise my face. I've decided not to do it in front of the mirror. it makes it easier but i still have to think hard to only use my fingertips. Its so so tempting though, I can still feel every bump and imperfection. BRING ON DAY 40!
wildflower
April 23, 2010
you're very welcome! it is so very encouraging to each of us to hear about enthusiastic determination in the making. as for moisturizing, i never ever felt the benefits of the various products i'd tried until i tried nature's bounty vitamin e oil. none of the others seemed to last. this one is comprised of a number of oils, one being lemon oil and it smells so lovely going on and because of the ratio of other oils in it it doesn't seem too too oily, just adequately so and i'm realizing its importance. i apply it right after my final rinse with cool water and it feels so calming and glides over all the imperfections such that they hardly seem noticeable. the oil was purchased at rite aid pharmacy if you live in the states. i love your determination! all the best to you !!
violet
April 22, 2010
i never realized how often my hands travel to my face until i started trying not to pick... it's like, whenever i am idle, my hands search for wounds to pick. it's insane! i think a lot of us have experienced the idea that we're somehow making things better by picking -- i guess we just have to keep drilling it in our heads that we are HARMING ourselves. there is not a single hint of helpfulness in our actions! but yeah, it's hard for me to grasp that too... hang in there! stay strong! keep us updated on your progress and please share any tips for things that work for you!
wildflower
April 22, 2010
you're absolutely right with everything you're saying! my hands still gravitate to my face !! using skype with a web cam you see a small image of yourself as well as a large image of who you are skyping with and i chuckle to myself seeing my hands rub my nose, or touch my cheek, or scratch my scalp. fortunately, i'm not touching my skin in a harming fashion now and that's the main thing. if we need to touch, we need to touch gently. over time, the wounds heal and it's actually nice to feel skin with no scabs.
Manon Morin
April 21, 2010
I will be getting off work soon and I think I may have touched my face about a dozen times if not more. I have a few little bumps but I am determined not to pick when I get home. I hope I can do it and not pick my face. Not one day has gone by without me picking my face. It will be hard. the evenings are always the toughest times of day for me. I need to avoid the bathroom mirror and keep my hands off my face. This is going to be so hard. I hope I can get through this day without picking. If I do I will have gone a whole day without picking. This 40 day challenge will be one of the biggest challenges for me.

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