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smash , 10 Aug 2010

Hair plucking... anyone have any similar experiences?

Like many of you, I also pick and pop zits. But my main problem is that I spend hours every day plucking out tiny hairs from my chin area. I think about doing it when I am at work and am unable to pluck. I feel like people are looking at my chin all day. When I get home, the first thing I do is lean over the bathroom sink searching for them, plucking and digging them out of my skin. I make myself bleed on a regular basis because I dig with tweezers or pins to get to the hairs. I make several trips back to the bathroom every night... trying to find any hairs I might have missed. I used to convince myself that what I was doing was just normal grooming. Like, what female wants to have hair on her face? It's embarrassing. But logically I know that it is not "normal" to sit in front of the mirror and totally lose track of time because you are plucking out hairs. I also started noticing that I plucked and picked more when I was upset or stressed. I did some Google-ing and came across both Chronic Skin Picking and Trichotillomania. Sometimes I think I have some kind of hybrid... most of the time I just think I'm totally nuts.

14 Answers

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Bathsheba

August 13, 2010

Hi Smash, I too pluck and pick my face. I am 30 and have picked for as long as i can remember. Currently and for the last few years it is solely my face that I attack and this is also when the plucking started (I guess through such intense scrutiny of the skin I was too aware of the little hairs to resist). I can honestly say that this condition has ruled and ruined my life until now. Finding this forum was a revelation and has made me feel sane, as I have previously wondered if I were schizophrenic having not been able to figure out how I can do this to myself. I have completely under-acheived in all aspects of my life. I am intelligent and ambitious yet do minimum wage jobs in order to go unnoticed. In relationships I become hyper-aware of how bad my skin looks and feel ashamed to be someones girl. I don't socialise anymore as I feel too disgusting which is also a problem with trying to conduct any relationship. I recently worked out that I don't see old friends either as I've wanted my skin to be better before I see them again. I've been waiting about 10 years for that to happen and am actually exhausted with it all. Unfortunately, I have evolved into a different, introverted and lonely person to the one I meant to become. I suffer depression, anxiety and social phobias. I also become improportionally angry and attribute this to hating myself and having the beginnings of bitterness manifesting within me, which terrifies me because I've always believed you make your own chances and the only thing holding me back that I can alter is my own behaviour; it's totally ridiculous. Please heed my warning and take control of this at the earliest point possible before it shapes your identity, happiness and destiny. I'm sorry to sound so depressing and extreme but I often feel suicidal and 90% of that feeling is because of this either directly or indirectly. I will (as I do daily) vow that I have picked for the last time (the plucking is now essential as I have messed up the hair folicles, the hair grows at a worse angle - so please do seek help in stopping soon if you have only just started). But I have a feeling that later this evening I will emerge from my trance like state, notice my bloodied finger nails and realise I have prolonged the zombie look...again.

Dancingpopes

October 06, 2010

Yep, me too. If I put as much effort into my business and cleaning my BMW as I d going after black hairs on my chin, I'd be rich. I can see the black hairs underrated my fair skin so I'll dig with a pin, tack, nail, whatever and end up making a huge gaping hole when there dent have to be one.

Popcorn47

October 06, 2010

Dancing, your fellow Bostonian friend here. I already replied to this thread, but I can so definitely relate. I was an over achiever my whole life,....three jobs, bank account, sports car, good money, and loads of self confidence. I don't see the correlation now but,....I'm not in work I am in school, my sports car died and get totaled, I am broke, and it seems like (this is so gross) I actually PLAN or look FORWARD TO when I can get home and pick. This is nasty. I got another nasty one, but I stopped doing it about 6 years ago. Around ten or eleven years ago I started to PLUCK my upper thigh hair and my public hair. I know I could shave it, or NARE it. Waxing just causes too many ingrowns making it worse. And here's something my husband couldn't understand: I actually LIKED the feeling of plucking hair. I'd pull it slow instead of fast so I could really feel the hair pull out. Isn't that gross? I stopped doing it now. Maybe once in a while (like a few times a year) I'll pull out an ingrown, but it was strange. I didn't TRY to stop. You can't try. You have to be ready without anxiety. I quit smoking the same way. Just woke up and oddly didn't want a cig, and the weirdest part is that I didn't go throgh any withdrawals or anything. When I "tried" to quit, big mistake. I have a feeling when/if I get to respect my fact, I'll do the same thing. Not yet though. I hope soon.

Bathsheba

August 13, 2010

Bathsheba

August 13, 2010

Hi Smash, I too pluck and pick my face. I am 30 and have picked for as long as i can remember. Currently and for the last few years it is solely my face that I attack and this is also when the plucking started (I guess through such intense scrutiny of the skin I was too aware of the little hairs to resist). I can honestly say that this condition has ruled and ruined my life until now. Finding this forum was a revelation and has made me feel sane, as I have previously wondered if I were schizophrenic having not been able to figure out how I can do this to myself. I have completely under-acheived in all aspects of my life. In relationships I become hyper-aware of how bad my skin looks and feel ashamed to be someones girl. I don't socialise anymore as I feel too disgusting which is also a problem with trying to conduct any relationship. I recently worked out that I don't see old friends either as I've wanted my skin to be better before I see them again. I've been waiting about 10 years for that to happen and am actually exhausted with it all. Unfortunately, I have evolved into a different, introverted and lonely person to the one I meant to become. I suffer depression, anxiety and social phobias. I also become improportionally angry and attribute this to hating myself and having the beginnings of bitterness manifesting within me, which terrifies me because I've always believed you make your own chances and the only thing holding me back that I can alter is my own behaviour; it's totally ridiculous. Please heed my warning and take control of this at the earliest point possible before it shapes your identity, happiness and destiny. I'm sorry to sound so depressing and extreme but I often feel suicidal and 90% of that feeling is because of this either directly or indirectly. I will (as I do daily) vow that I have picked for the last time (the plucking is now essential as I have messed up the hair folicles, the hair grows at a worse angle - so please do seek help in stopping soon if you have only just started). But I have a feeling that later this evening I will emerge from my trance like state, notice my bloodied finger nails and realise I have prolonged the zombie look...again.

Popcorn47

October 06, 2010

Oh my God, you know I didn't realize how long it's been since I've posted here. I miss this site and I really need this site. In fact, I was hoping I could find a sponsor. Even BE a sponsor. I can relate to the hair plucking in a huge way. On my upper lip I have about 4 hairs on each side/corner of my mouth. But on my chin, they're long and huge. My mom has them and I can't stop staring at them. That may be why I'm so self consciousl I don't just use tweezers either because a lot of the times the hairs just slip out. I do the needles too trying to open it up so it'll come out easier. Oh toots, we're not nuts. We have a chemical imbalance, we have a sickness. Think of how many women have hair there and don't do a thing about it. I think wildflower mentioned a while ago she thought it had to do with our need to be perfectionists. We don't like the feel of scabby bumps, and we can really feel how bristly the hair is on our chin. I go to a school with a girl who has a beard if that makes either of us feel any better. It could be worse. It's her ethnicity, because she shaves her neck like a guy does and she always has all this dark stubble. She also has sideburns. Even white folks get it. I had another friend who, same thing, she shaved her neck and it looked like a beard. But she did laser to have it removed, and permanent or temporary it looks really good. I learned that exfoliating thins out the shaft of the hair making it less noticeable. But if you pluck it, it grows back to its original thick self. Then if we slough it, it thins out again. But I can't leave it alone, because I can feel it. I'm always feeling with my fingers and get anxious to get home. I've got 4 pair of tweezers because they don't always meet tightly. Oh girlie we could be good friends and stay up late talking about these habits we share!

hopingtalkingw…

April 02, 2013

Hi, I can see the dates on here are a few years ago - are any of you still around? I have had similar issues since my late teens but I have been too ashamed to talk about this. You know, when you put it into perspective and realise you have a loving family, food on your table, a career you work hard, a roof over your head...it makes you feel a little ashamed to let something like this affect your life. Yet this is my problem that can still make me cry in a second no matter how good things are (!) so I am hoping this will provide both myself or others with some solace; It has negatively affected my life in so many ways.... When I think of the things I missed I get annoyed that I let this really get to me...I would pluck and then try to cover with concealer and put make up over it....which looked terrible and sometimes I wouldn't have the strength to try again...or if I did I really had to think about where we were going or where I would sit. I was ruined if we went somewhere bright as I would have to sit with my head in my hands and look all unsociable with my body language. It is sooooo fecking annoying as I totally love meeting new people and hearing their story but most of the time I cannot face the plucking and just stay in. This has also caused problems with boyfriends as if it is looking particularly bad I avoid seeing them. It worsened when the media began to make a big thing about facial hair and started saying how it was THE worst and ugliest thing. I was already conscious there were a few hairs but this made it worse. I am considered an attractive, nice girl and I am friendly and approachable. However, I can get very nervous and defensive around people as I wonder if they are the type of person who would mock me about this. When I went to the toilet did the girls discuss it? When I herd a friend comment on someone I would wonder if the comment was about me and my black hairs at some other time? I am just thankful that this made me a better person as I would never hurt someone in the way others have done to me. I just went off blabbing about certain occasions and how other peoples comments caused me to feel such horrific feelings of despair and made me wish I had some disease that I could at least fight rather than this which was a life time one. Sounds dramatic but that is really how it feels. It has caused me to leave jobs I was doing well in as those who felt their thunder was stolen would want to put me down...whether it be that I made more sales than them or the guy they liked for a while asked me out, or they were fat. Funny how I never understood that how so many fat people are bullies and seem to think everything is wonderful in our world as you we are simply of normal weight. Well....this has felt great I suppose but I cannot go on forever..going to head back to real life as need to spend the next 15 mins at the mirror before my man arrives to make sure there are none there!!! If it is only myself that reads this then at least it has already been useful :-)

Nikki179

April 03, 2013

So I found this website and another called stoppickingonme . com and it makes me feel a little better knowing I'm not the only one who is going through this, but on both sites most of the forum is from a while back. While reading your post and a few others I'm just thinking how I think and feel the exact same way! It might sound dramatic to say that this issue is something that has taken over my life, but that's just how it feels. I realize it's ridiculous, and that makes me feel even more ashamed. I started 3 1/2 years ago and since the first time I "over plucked", I said it would be the last time. I feel like I've missed out on a lot of things because I'm so self conscious now. I even stay in my house for days when I'm letting the wounds heal. Then I do good for a few days and go right back to it. I threw out my tweezer once to try to make myself stop, but then I needed it for my eyebrows so I went and bout another one. (I pick at the mustache area near the corners of my mouth and sometimes my chin too). Last night I hid them so I would maybe at least think twice before just picking them right up. Trying to cover up with make up is frustrating as well. It can take up to an hour or more just to get it right. Then when it's hot I worry about sweating and the makeup coming off or when it's cold I worry about my skin being too try and the affected area cracks. Because I don't live alone, I try to cover it up from the moment I wake up and then at night I only put Neosporin. I read about calamine lotion on here and someone said it heals wounds almost overnight so I went straight to the store to buy it. Well it was a bad idea! It's taking my wounds twice as long to heal now. The only thing that "helps" is that it covers up the area in white so you can't "see" the area and won't pick, but when you wash it off, it's like a fresh open wound again and the surrounding skin is hard and dry so it's so hard to cover up. I went back to the only thing I know that works which is the Neosporin. It takes about 3-4 days, but it works. I'm always looking for something that works faster but I have to come to terms with the fact that nothing will really work overnight. No one has ever said anything to me about the spots on my face so I don't know how it looks from outside. Like are they just being nice by not asking, do they not really see it as bad as I do, or what are they really thinking? Like "what is that? She looks gross". Even though on these sites there's so many people going through this, I haven't seen anyone that looks like they do the same thing. I would think that if I see someone with something on their face that looks like mine it's because they are dealing with this same issue, but everyone seems to have great skin which brings me down and makes me more self conscious because I feel ugly and like I'm the only one who does this. I just want to feel pretty. I want to be able to wash my face and be done in 5 minutes. If I'm at home, I would like to go makeup free. But this is so time consuming. And what's crazy is we KNOW the results, we KNOW how it makes us feel, yet we keep doing it. I really really really wish the best for everyone on here. When I go about a week with no picking and my skin heels, I feel GREAT and like I can do this, I can stop. But I guess we're like addicts and we just relapse. I hope we can all get to the point of STOPPING and feeling GREAT again. If anyone wants to swap emails and maybe even phone numbers to text, maybe we could help each other that way. Right now I have 3 spots I'm waiting on to heal, like I said, the calamine lotion has doubled the time for these wounds to heal. I feel like for the past couple months I had done ok, the picking I did do was minor and would heal quick. But then the last couple weeks I don't know what happened, I've been doing bad. And I too realize it's when I'm extra stressed or upset or down about something. I need to stop, I'm desperate. I'm tired of feeling like I'm wasting my life away because I'm "hiding from the world" so to speak. I too can go on forever more in depth about how this is affecting me. I just know how bad this makes me feel so I honestly hope that everyone who is going through this can get past it.

Freyes755

July 31, 2013

Hey you're sooooooo not alone! I feel your pain. Well here's my story I've been suffering with this problem since I've been 24 I am now 28 (3 months short of 29) it started out of nowhere and at first was just a little bit of hair then as the years passed it came with a vengeance and I had no choice but to pluck. The hairs varied from thin to coarse, I had a lot of thin ones that couldn't really be noticed unless u looked closely and then I had some very coarse one that have me no choice but to pluck and remove them. Eventually i began to suffer from scars (small whole in my chin area) ingrown hair and a massive amount of dark blemishes. Once I reached this point I took action and scheduled an appointment for laser hair removal, I paid for an entire years worth meaning I will get 11-12 treatments (one every 4-6 weeks) now the problem is when you're having this procedure done you are not allowed to pluck or wax or thread the hair because it will remove it from the root and that prevents the procedure from being successful or slows up the process. So since you can't remove he hair in those forms all that's left I shaving (I don't use nair or anything of that sort because it doesn't remove the hair entirely for me) so I have been shaving since I got my first treatment about 4 months ago and the result has been catastrophic!!!!! The amount big hair I have now I ridiculous!!! And they are extremely coarse and black!!!! And to make matters worse the skin where I shave is darkened it I about 6 shades darker than my normal skin (I guess this is a 5 o'clock shadow) my skin is so damaged, i even get razor burn and that hurts. Putting make up over a freshly shaved chin burns and is not pleasant but I have to do it this way because I have to shave everyday single day (that's how fast the hair grows!!!! I shave twice if I go out in the evening). Anyway I'm up to my 4th treatment and I have not seen any results!!! Funny thing is I get the treatment on my legs too and I actually see bald patches. Today I had an embarrassing moment where I wanted to hide and just disappear this guy asked me today if I was a man, now the funny thing is I'm very attractive very feminine and was shocked that anyone can confuse me for a man so I asked him what about me gives you the impression I am a man and he responded "you know" and moved his hands towards his chin and said "you have a beard and mustache" I wanted to die!!!! I thought I was doing a great job covering my blemishes or "5 o'clock shadow" with makeup plus I shaved just 3 hours who're tho incident. So I came home and plucked all the hairs I had, it took almost 2 hours to get most of them. I know I wasn't suppose to pluck while your still getting treated but I panicked and didn't know what else to do. The scars are still very visible and the skin is still extremely damaged and dark but hopefully the surface of the skin will be smoother and the makeup will look better. Anyway I hope you find a way to hope with this problem. I will continue to be on the search for a solution :(

rubberducke

August 05, 2013

You are not nuts. Well, this disorder is kind of making you nuts...... but it's not your fault. I hope you can stop.

Momof3

November 16, 2018

I am so glad I found this thread. I’m currently a level 10 plucker and seriously needing help with how to stop! I spend about two hours each night after washing my face with about three ineffective tweezers, a bright light pointed at my chin, and a ten times mirror so I can see the black suckers that are under the skin. The ones on top crop up all day. If I pluck just the top ones in the morning there are new ones by bedtime! The real issue is with my digging! I see the hair lying under the skin in this weird angle, knowing it’s going to cause a bump eventually so I feel justified in digging it out right now! Sometimes it’s easy breezy and I’m able to make a little prick and pluck it out. Other times and more commonly, I will do whatever it takes to get that little fecker! Even if it costs me a three day lockdown with aquaphor slathered on my chin! I hate hate hate that my chin constantly feels rough and prickly so the touching is triggering me. Then the fact that I can see the black dots of growth underneath is also what gets me. I can’t let it rest. I have to pin prick them out and then pluck. You’d think I’d get a two day reprieve for my efforts? No sir! By morning there is new growth just waiting to ruin my effing day. The aquaphor is essential bc it heals without letting a scab form. This is how I avoid scars. But my hubby is sick of looking at my greased out chin from my own hand! He’s telling me to go and get the laser already but the fact you can’t pluck during treatment is all the discouragement I need! Hell no if I’m going to go three days without plucking. The rest of my facial skin is very clear and blemish free and then I have all this crap from digging on my chin that I have to cover with makeup very poorly, I might add, as you cannot hide lunar potholes with paint!!! How has anyone effectively gotten over this ocd-like issue? It makes me grumpy and irritated on top of it which isn’t fair to the family. I need to get a grip. But I’m not sure how.

Addiction77

March 28, 2019

Hello,
I'm new; first time on this site so I haven't taken the quiz or anything. I was googling for reasons why a female wouldn't be able to pluck chin hairs at root (mine seem to be elastic, like a rubber band and break when I try to pluck them). I have polyocystic ovaries, so thick, unwanted facial hair is expected. However, when I read through everyone's posts, I felt they were talking about me!

First, I read smash's post, and the whole time I'm trying to understand, "where lies the problem?" You see, smash was describing me. Then she spelled it out, it's not normal to lose track of time, plucking facial hair for hours.

So, okay, I got that. But in my mind I'm still thinking, "but it's a physical or biological problem, not a mental health issue. Right? I mean, wouldn't any sane female, who had thick, dark facial hair that grew in under the skin sideways, but shallow enough that you can see that dark, thick facial hair, take a tweezer and dig until the hair was exposed so it could be plucked? And I'm assuming that she, nor I, are imagining these hairs. So, how is this a mental health issue?

Then I read Bathsheba's comment...and I began to sob.

Whether this unnatural facial hair growth is a physical problem or not, it has completely turned me into someone I don't even know. I used to be a social butterfly. I was confident and outgoing. In the past year or so, since this happened to me, whatever it is, I hardly leave my house, maybe once every other month. I no longer interact with society, I don't work and I don't even contact friends anymore. I've isolated myself because I'm too embarrased to see anyone and...just like Bathsheba, I'm waiting for my skin to heal. My depression cycles are becoming more and more frequent. (I suffer from bipolar I disorder. Oh...my manic phases definitely intensify my focus on facial hair.)

I could go on and on pointing out my reflection in each comment, but I'm thinking, most who join this site can do that too. So I would like to end with a thank you to everyone who commented and a special thank you to Smash for initiating this thread. Without it, I wouldn't have recognized what I'm doing is not normal and not okay and I also would not have known that I'm not alone.

stephensam

May 07, 2019

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lesathomas

July 24, 2019

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Regards, AssertMeds.com

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