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bottervliegie , 20 Sep 2010

21-Day Challenge

Hi everyone! I hate how I feel about myself and I hate how my skin looks when all I really want is smooth and beautiful skin. I figure that we've got this absolute desire to be beautiful and have perfect skin while spots, blackheads, coarse cuticles, ingrown hairs, etc. is not welcome on beautiful skin. So, a combination of this perfectionism, impulse and, well, addiction, makes us scar ourselves and also hate ourselves for doing so. .................................................................................................................................................... Now, here's my challenge: You've probably heard that it takes 21 days to combat and quit a bad habit. I am going to try and do it with skin picking. I have posted post-its on all my mirrors and usual picking spots in the house with just "DAY 1" to remind me of what I am up against. I will change this daily, but if I falter, I have to start back at day 1. .................................................................................................................................................... I really want to change my life and be free of this and I am going to take the bull by the horns... WHO'S WITH ME?? I will post my progress on this topic and I encourage you to do the same, starting with today as DAY 1!
241 Answers
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kellybean327
December 26, 2010
I know exactly how you feel. I pick for so long sometimes and then I look in the mirror and I feel terrible. I was on day 4 also when I messed up this morning. I'm starting over right now. Here's wishing us both the best of luck and the strongest will power. I know eventually we will both make it to day 21!
sho1234
December 27, 2010
Wrecked my face!!!! I have no hope in ever stopping now. But tomorow il start the 21 day challenge.im sick to death of looking like this!
BlackSwan
December 27, 2010
I'm new to this site - but old to picking! I just saw the movie Black Swan where Natalie Portman scratches at her back and tries to cover it up, and it reminded me of my own nonstop obsession where I scrutinize every little pore, pick non-pimples until they become pimples, go into the trance, wear selective clothing based on my picking (no showing my back this week, got to hide my chest the next week, better cover up my arms the following)...it started when I was a teen, and now I'm 35. Like many here, it's relaxing and then I feel horrible. I also love the gratification of getting gunk out of my pores - like it makes me more "perfect" when it's actually the opposite. I try to see my skin as a whole, but then I go into this state when I see it like pixels where every pore could contain some imperfection. I have tried sooo many methods to try to stop and the longest I've made it was a week. I'm an expert at hiding it - I'm social, have friends, work at a really famous fashion brand and dress the part...but there's this dark side I want to overcome. Like in the movie, I want to be perfect, the white swan, but I feel like I go to the darkness. I wasted my 20s, when I would have had perfect skin, on this obsession - I have to stop. It will take so much willpower, but I'm hoping this support group can help. I'll commit to being honest with my progress - please, please, please let this be the time I truly stop. It won't just "happen" miraculously - I'm going to have to be vigilant every second and not slip. Wish me luck - and I hope I can help others too. It is so hard to stop. My personal CBT starts NOW.
Jolene
December 28, 2010
I identify with everything you said and am in a very similar situation. I am on my 2nd try for this 21 day challenge and it is really tough, checking in to this forum every day does really help. Aside form this forum, the only person I ever talk to about it is my boyfriend who is supportive, but baffled by the whole thing. Lately I've become aware that aside from picking in-front of the mirror, when I am working on the computer or doing almost anything my free hand is constantly scanning the surface of my face, back and neck, scratching and picking. In addition to the sick need for perfection, I think it is a sort of pent up anxiousness or nervous energy. I haven't seen Black Swan yet, but I used to be a dancer, so that sort of self-destructive need for perfection completely resonates. I wish you strength and resolve in controlling the urge. How wonderful It would be to be free of this problem, to be able to go out without make-up on and wear whatever we feel like wearing. Cheers to that!
bcs123
December 31, 2010
I recently saw Black Swan and it also reminded me of my bad habits of picking at myself. I can relate to everything you've said. Lately when I look in the mirror I try to focus on my eyes and tell myself that it's ok to not have perfect skin, and then to walk away and find something else to do right away to distract me from spending so much time just staring at all the imperfections. I switched all my light bulbs in the bathroom to red bulbs and it makes it so you can't see the blemishes. Good luck!
seams
January 13, 2011
I relate so much to everything you expressed. I recently saw Blackswan and had the same reaction; it brought up the reality of how destructive and angry my skin picking is. It’s my obsessive attempt at perfection, but with the inevitable consequence of causing even more damage. I have this urge for smoothness, even at the cost of blood and ruin. I have the same fears about wasting the skin of my 20's on this compulsion. But I remain hopeful that with all the amazing skin care breakthroughs, my 30's and 40's can make up for it. That is if I get control of this picking. There is so much shame in this. I even had a hard time "coming out" to my therapist. My boyfriend is amazing, but is frustrated when I can't talk about it. I hate to even face him without makeup. So much of my time is wasted on the picking and then the cover; hours of devising the best concealing techniques to broken skin. I have made the commitment to this 21 day challenge, after cutting back considerably. I did the same thing with smoking and it seemed to be pretty effective.
sho1234
December 27, 2010
How r u all doing? I have dun day 1 just abowt- i came very close!
BlackSwan
December 27, 2010
Hi! I'm almost through day one - though night is the danger zone! It's amazing how habitually I go to pick, without even being aware of it. I have checked myself many times today, pulling myself away from the mirror. I have to get through this day - good luck to you (but, more accurately, be STRONG - luck doesn't seem to work!).
sho1234
December 27, 2010
Thats good. Wel dun. Oh so have I!-Been constantly going to mirror,start to and walking away with unease. Stressful isnt it! Good luck with today and i wil stay determind tomorow!
BlackSwan
December 27, 2010
Thank you - and good job by you too!!! When the mirror lures you in, WALK AWAY! I will too. Better to babble on this forum - anything to start a new chapter of life and not waste time picking and regretting and blahblahblah. So over it.
sho1234
December 27, 2010
Good luck for tomorow i mean. For sum strange reason i had it in mind that u come from sumwhere that is a day ahead of here. We can do it!
sho1234
December 28, 2010
Its day 2 and i have failed big time!! I believe that i have opend up pores so its al gna come bak worse. I believe that the dents and nicks in skin wil fil up and turn into sumthing. I feel like i hav basicali set my skin up to become worse. Its my fault it keeps filling bak and find more coz i spread bacteria and that if i did it in a way that bacteria wouldnt spread in the first place i wouldnt have this problem. I have to prevent pores frum becoming too out of control for me to deal with. I cant stand my face getting well beyond the point of easily removing/ fixing it. I wont kno where i was.
BlackSwan
December 28, 2010
Hey! Sorry to hear that but you can just start now. My friend is quitting smoking and said that if he slips he can't just say "oh well, it's back to smoking again" - consider it a slip up, and start today. It's so hard to do but I think you literally need to avoid mirrors. Or put gloves on. Prevent yourself from temptation. I read the "About" section of this site last night and the founder said he still doesn't know WHY he has the impulse to pick - we might not be able to figure it out, but we need to control our behavior, even though every fiber in our being is saying PICK PICK PICK. I got through Day 1 - but I'm no safer now. Resist the urge - and I will too!
sho1234
December 28, 2010
Yep-ive drawn another 21 day challenge chart. Gota let everything heal. I used to go to mirror when i felt anxious or tense. Now I am led to mirror to pick if i can feel it. I pick to prevent what i dont want to see or have in my skin. Do you identify with that? I hope your day 2 is going well. !
BlackSwan
December 28, 2010
I completely identify with that - my rationalization is that clogged pores are bad, so I want to get the stuff out so my skin is "perfect"...but it only makes it worse, and creates inflammation/redness/zits that otherwise would only lurk below the surface and, I guess, eventually go away - that's the part I can't believe: that it would get better on its own. I'm trying to think of every second - EVERY chance to pick is the challenge. I read another post that said: "it's an impulse control problem: we must control the impulse". That's what I am trying to do - and just yesterday I had over a hundred near-pick experiences...but I forced/yanked myself away. Let's get thru this day!!!
ash01
December 29, 2010
That's what I think everytime I pick... just clear the pore and then I'll stop.. but we all know that one pick is never enough... Day 2 again... maybe this time will be better, I am really gonna try my hardest :)
sho1234
December 28, 2010
Lol I feel like the only only 1 frum uk! Its 6-38pm over here. Im feeling strong to beat impuse!
BlackSwan
December 28, 2010
I just came back to my laptop because I had a close call - was lurking near the mirror! I have off from work this week so more chance to fall into my bad pattern.
viviteshop
December 29, 2010
I read another post that said: "it's an impulse control problem: we must control the impulse". That's what I am trying to do - and just yesterday I had over a hundred near-pick experiences.

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