Feeling defeated

This is my story: I've been a compulsive picker since the 5th grade, (I'm 23 now) and I didn't really understand or accept I had a problem until a few weeks ago. It's gotten extremely worse, there has been a lot of change in my life and I don't know how to handle it. I moved into my own apartment (alone), started a demanding career, etc. Every time I accomplish something, 5 new problems come up. Anyway, I pick any bump on my skin, mainly my arms, lips, legs. And I pull apart every split end I can find. I'm pretty good at hiding it, but my friends and family are starting to notice my hair is getting a bit thinner, even though it's pretty long. I could pick my imperfections all day if I wanted. But I keep it under control at work as much as I can, I usually take a few minutes in the bathroom to do it. When I'm alone at home, it's out of control. I think that if you can convince your husband to go to marriage counseling it might help the situation. Sometimes a 3rd party can put things in perspective, you could even give him control by letting him choose the doc. In any event, it might be a good idea for you to see a counselor for you, be selfish. I find it's a good way to get out my frustrations and put my relationships in perspective. About the picking, the first step (which I'm still working on) is trying to identify the picking behavior. When does it happen? What happens right before? How do you feel after? I have a little journal where I write down the times of day that I want to pick. I find that's helping me understand my problem. The next step I would do is figure out triggers, why it really happens, etc. Then I'll substitute the behavior out for something constructive. Maybe a toy I can have on me at all times to keep my hands busy, idk. I'm not there yet. I hope I helped...I wish you well on your journey. And I'm sure if you work on it, you won't be doing this forever. Acceptance is the first step in solving a problem. :-)