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nomorepickingplease , 04 Mar 2011

Stopping for good this time.

Ok. I can do this. I am not going to do what I usually do and wait until tomorrow to try again - I am stopping NOW. I don't care that I have already picked today. Although I am halfway through the day I am going to make this day 1. I am going to be really strict about not looking at my skin or touching it apart from when I put my makeup on in the morning. This has worked before for a few days, but I've never made it past day 3!!! Wish me luck! I am going to update this every day - join me in doing this if you want to and we can support each other!
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nomorepickingplease
March 08, 2011
DAY 2 - another day done :) I'm so happy with myself right now!! If I make it through tomorrow I will have beaten my record and I'll feel like I might actually be stopping for good this time!
llama06
March 08, 2011
That's amazing! Well done. :) Yesterday was hard for me. Got really stressed out about some things going on in my life, and realised just how much I use picking as a release. Couldn't believe how wound up I was! And then I started crying because I realised that I really wanted to pick, but I couldn't EVER AGAIN. Can't believe how messed up my head is that I end up crying because I can no longer destroy my face. I mean seriously? That's not right! Anyway, I didn't pick. So yay! But it is really tough. I've got a few bumps under my skin that I can feel that I'm dying to have a go at, but i'm hoping they will go away over the next few days which will make it easier. Come on day three!!!! 'nomore' just think of what an amazing achievement it is that you have done two whole days pick free, and how awesome it will feel to break your previous record. Prove to yourself that you ARE that strong. I'm with you all the way.
nomorepickingplease
March 09, 2011
I get really upset when I think about not picking ever again too!! Isn't that stupid? But it is a really scary thought because it's such a comforting thing to do.I can't believe I didn't make it past day three again :( You are doing so so well!!! Don't feel like you have to start over all over again with me - your progress is encouraging me so keep going! I will try to focus on the fact that I managed two days so I should be able to manage two again, and then I'll tackle day three when I get to it. Good luck and keep going and thank you for your support!
nomorepickingplease
March 09, 2011
Day 3 - :( I never make it past day three! Ever. Grrrr can't believe it. Just spent three whole hours straight picking. Horrific. I even got complimented on my skin today for the first time in ages and now I've gone and ruined it all. Picked mostly on my face - it's a mess :( :( I just enjoy picking so much! And when I don't pick I feel like I really have to. I feel miserable. But I'm not giving up. Though right now I don't feel like there is any point in trying since I am clearly incapable of stopping. But I am starting again tomorrrow - well, today because it is now 3am but when I wake up in the morning It will be the first morning of lent which I had forgotten about. So I will try to give up picking for lent. 40 days. One day at a time... I don't think I can do it. But I'll try all the same. Feel like I've let everyone down :( back to square one...
anonymous31894
March 10, 2011
i'm starting day 14 now :) its amazing and i hsould really give myself more credit but lately i have been obsessing over ok my skin is clear so lets keep it that way and heal the scars adn as a result i'm using too much mix of products that are irritating my skin. so i'm currently frustrated but things can only get better because i really can't see myself caving on picking this time. no reason to.
llama06
March 09, 2011
It's ok. :) I think you're doing really well and I know how easy it is to slip. The fact that you did two whole days is amazing. Just think how long its been since you achieved that! So focus on the fact that you KNOW you can do two days, so think about beating that three day record. Anyway, I'm finding it pretty tough myself. Felt really upbeat about stopping the first few days. Now the whole thing just seems to be stressing me out and upsetting me. Seem to be much more focused on how stupid I am for doing this rubbish thing in the first place than what i'm achieving by stopping. Hmmmph. Maybe I'm just having a bad day. Haven't really picked, but my strict rules are slipping too. I picked a whitehead yesterday and today I picked off a scab, in the mirror, and started to squeeze it. I did stop, but it's a slippery slope and the fact that i'm starting to think it's ok to do that is not a good sign. *sigh*. It just seems exhausting trying to fight this. Not sure I have the energy. :( 'no more' please please please keep updating here. Really want you to make that three day record. It just seems really important that you achieve it. Think if you managed that you would have so much more confidence in your ability to stop. You don't really seem to believe you can at the moment, but I think you're wrong. The fact that you are trying so hard, and that you managed two whole days is massively positive. Would love to see you make three days!! :)
nomorepickingplease
March 10, 2011
Don't worry I will definitely keep posting through the whole thing because i'm finding it really helpful! It's good to have somewhere I can let someone know what's going on. I don't really have anyone I can talk to about this - I'm sure even the people I've told don't really want to hear an update about how I'm doing every day! So thanks for listening :) I think you are right about making it past day three - if I do that I will really feel like I have made a breakthrough. How are you doing today? Still feeling down? You mustn't blame yourself for picking! You didn't ask for this but YOU are the one who has decided to put an end to it - be proud of that. How many days have you actually managed so far? Think about that when you feel bad but also think about all the days ahead of you - you can choose to spend those days picking or free of picking, and you are choosing to be free! We can't change all the time we spent picking in the past but we can change the course of our future. We can do this together. I know how exhausting it is! It's horrible but I am hoping that after long enough it will get easier to fight. For the moment we mustn't let our guard down - that is what I do on day three every time. Keep being strict with yourself! I got a bit upset today because I had a shower in the dark and I'm keeping all the lights dim, and I just felt really stupid and angry that I had to do that. But then I thought it's better to do that than to pick! And one day I will be able to uncover my mirrors and turn the lights on. We can have less rules and be less strict once we've made it far enough, but for the moment don't let your guard down. Well done for stopping yourself once you had started to pick - that is really really difficult so it's more of an acheivement than a failure. Hope you have managed to keep your hands away today. Good luck for tomorrow! I am already making plans for day three including painting my nails and going to the gym which I rarely do! I have actually been carrying nail varnish around in my bag so that if I feel like I reeeeeally have to pick I can paint them straight away! Haven't had to do that yet. Here's to day 2!!
anggoespublic
March 09, 2011
i literally did a number on my face last night. i'm 24 with a career and an amazing boyfriend. wtf is wrong with me? this needs to stop. giving it up for lent. for good. please help support by following my blog: anggoespublic.tumblr.com
lexyw
March 10, 2011
i'm giving it up for lent too! but, i'm not verbalizing it yet cuz i'm really nervous. i had 8 days a few days ago and crashed and burned. but i'm glad i'm not the only one going after this humongous goal!! lent day one, check!
nomorepickingplease
March 11, 2011
LENT DAY 2 - good and bad today - good because I have not picked a lot but bad because I did pick a bit.... I always start by scratching the back of my neck because it is an easy place to reach in the day time. So I scratched that and then my face had a few spots because it always gets worse this time of the month and so I picked a few of those and some spots on my chin.... it's really annoying but I didn't pick more than 5 mins so I am allowing myself this one slip up because I don't want to give up on lent. If it happens again I might have to start over again. I have gotten better at telling myself I don't need to check my skin because if there is anything there I won't be able to pick anyway, but having spots on my face is just too much! I hate the idea of walking around like that even though I know it isn't really that bad. In my head it just seems like the worst thing ever ever ever but then I think of friends I know with spotty skin and I tell myself it is not so bad to have a few spots and it's better than picking and making it worse.... I think the key for me is not letting myself touch my skin in the first place. Trying not to care about any spots or bumps or scabs I might have. But it is hard! Anyway I am allowing this one slip up but only once, since it was only 5 minutes. The day time is now the hardest part - I seem to be managing morning and bedtime routines fairly well now becasue I am always really focused. But in the day I forget how important it is not to touch. Anyway, on to day three tomorrow. I might wear gloves...
nomorepickingplease
March 11, 2011
:( as soon as I posted that comment I picked for an hour... even got the tweezers out which I had hidden. really bad on my forehead. Grrrr I hate this so so so so so so so much. Back to day one. I don't think I liked the pressure of lent any way :( Booooooo I am sorry everybody but I will keep trying :(
lexyw
March 11, 2011
oh I'm so sorry!! I completely know what that feels like. to be so proud or determined and then to have your own self mess it up. I think that's what other ppl don't get--it's just not as easy as having will power. if we all spent as much energy as we do trying to stop on our "willpower" and that was really te answer we'd all be magically cured!!! this is te hardest work I've ever had to do and I'm sure it's like that for you too I would imagine. don't worry. tomorrow is a new day! you can have your own delayed start to lent. nobody will tell :) good luck tomorrow! it's not just you. it could/probably will happen to all of us
llama06
March 11, 2011
I think it gets harder once you have slipped up once. It's easier to tell yourself there's no point, you've already failed so you might as well go the whole way! Plus I'm finding that actually it takes a lot of energy to stop, because I'm constantly thinking about it. It drains you and then it's harder to stay motivated. Just think how determined you were when you first wrote this thread. You need to try and find a little bit of that strength to get you going again. DO NOT GIVE UP! Wake up tomorrow with a fresh outlook, and don't think about the past. It's a new start. Cover up your mirror again, hide your tweezers (give them to someone else if you have to!!) and shower in the dark. It seems silly but it helps. I used to have a little mirror in my handbag and one in my office desk drawer. I took them both, plus all the removable mirrors in my house (including one hidden down the side of my bed! lol!) and gave them to my boyfriend to hide. Doesn't mean it's not hard not to pick at home in front of my full length mirror, but not having access to the two little mirrors during the day has been a MASSIVE help. I keep finding myself going to get them without thinking bout it, and the only thing that is stopping me destroying my face is that they aren't there anymore!! 'no more' maybe lent was too big a goal. I'd go back to taking it hour by hour. And have a real treat in mind for the end of each day you make it. Since your record is three days, have something truely amazing lined up for the end of day three, something to focus on if the urge gets too strong. Three days is 72 hours. Many of those you are asleep for. So, if you make it to a day and a half, you're already half way there. Come on woman. I'm not giving up on you, and i'm not letting you give up on yourself! :) Go back over this thread, and see how well you've been doing and promise yourself a fresh start tomorrow with no blame for your slip ups. If any of us thought this was easy, we wouldn't be on this forum! Good luck.
nomorepickingplease
March 12, 2011
:) your post made me smile - thank you! It's nice being congratulated for making it through one day by people who know how hard it is :) I have put my tweezers away and am going back to doing all bathroom things in the dark! I feel ridiculous but I know it is worth it. Thinking about it is reeeally draining and I always think that if I let myself look at my skin then I'd stop obsessing but that is such a lie. The more we pick the more we feed into obsessing, so I am sure that there will come a point when thinking about it stops being so draining. Keep going! I have sort of put my life on hold at the moment while I sort this out - am absolutely determined to crack it this time. When I look back over the past three weeks I can see that I have been consistently better - have managed quite a number of days pick free but every couple of days there's usually a long session on that horrid day 3 I just can't seem to beat! But it is encouraging to look back over the past weeks and see that the constant effort is at least having some effect. I am so so soooo hoping to get past three days this time so am not giving up. Am treating every day as if it is day one - remembering that I have to make a constant effort every single day if I want to beat this. Otherwise I start forgetting how easy it is to pick. It's stupid but after 2 days it's almost like I can't remember how bad picking actually is and I lose the motivation I have on day one and all I can think about is how much I would enjoy picking. I forget about all the pain that comes with it! Silly me. Am trying to remember that this time. Thank you everyone you are an immense help. And well done llama06 for keeping so strong you are an inspiration and I cannot wait for the day I can tell you I made it past day 3!!
AndreaAnonymous
March 20, 2011
Hello nomorepicking, you really inspire me by your determination, i feel your pain, i threw my tweezers out. I also filed my nails down reeeeaaly short, like almost painful short, id rather have screwed up fingernails than a massacred face (which mine is right now):( i'm back to day one tomorow but i am hopeful, keep working at it, and i will do the same
lexyw
March 11, 2011
hey fellow lenters. day 3 and I slipped. picked for about 10 mins just now and I feel sooooo low. I was so excited to have this goal. and now I'm so let down. what's worse is I hate telling my boyfriend when I've had a setback. so just thinking about seeing him tonight is making me nervous. and I'm most prone to picking when I'm apprehensive or nervous. I'm thinking of giving myself a pass but I know I'm only cheating myself. I really wanted to complete this for lent. thanks for the posts below. they're very motivational. hopefully I'll feel better soon but my stomach is in knots right now

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