Online Test

Find out the severity of your symptoms with this free online test

Take the test
ri4821 , 28 Mar 2011

19, Frustrated and Sad.

I'm in college, and everything about me right now feels so messed up. I have really low self-esteem and am struggling to see myself as beautiful- not only physically, but for who I am as a person too. I started picking at my nose in middle school, because I wanted to get rid of blackheads. Then i gradually started scrutinizing the rest of my face, and began picking there. Now, at 19, I pick at my face, neck, chest, shoulders, and back. I am disgusted with myself and am so tired of making things worse. I want to clear pimples and blackheads and whiteheads and basically any blemish I see, no matter how minuscule they are. The longest I went was 4 days without picking. I know I can't pick at ANYTHING, not even one spot, because I'll just let myself go crazy with the rest of my skin. I don't know how to stop and still feel beautiful. My picking is often onset by stress but it's also somewhat of a habit. I tell myself to stop but keep doing it; my brain can't seem to control my hands. Help please. I'm on day 2 of not picking, but I am struggling. I am so sad, and I want to quit.
12 Answers
Add Comment
beneventol
March 28, 2011
Im 14 and have been picking for my whole life i need help too. But just saying that you need help can cause you to pick more. i have not gotten help yet and i have destroyed my hands.in your case get help berfore it is to late like me. and even if you dont look beautiful anyone can figure out that the outside dosent matter its what is in side the person. if you pick at any time just wear gloves it distracts you from picking. thats what my parents didfor me when i was little and if you bite your nailswear nail polish so if you bite it they will taste nasty. beneventol
ri4821
March 28, 2011
I don't think you should be saying it's "too late." I mean, you're on here or you wouldn't be so fatalistic in thinking you can't change things. And I've tried gloves but have you tried typing on a computer or actually doing homework while wearing gloves? It's kind of tough. I don't bite my nails though so that's not an issue, but thanks.
ri4821
March 29, 2011
I appreciate it, and I don't mean to seem like I'm attacking you. I'm just really sick of dealing with this, as I'm sure you are too. But I really mean it when I say it isn't too late. I wish you wouldn't think that way- you're still so young! And anyway, no matter what age, I think we're all capable of overcoming these things... it's just so so so so SO hard to believe it. I totally gave in today, and I'm so mad at myself for it, but I'm going to keep trying new things and figure this out.
vacant-mind
March 30, 2011
Im 19, and picked my whole life.. but it became a serious issue after taking medications for depression and anxiety. It wasn't clear then that the meds were what was triggering it... because it had seemed like Id been doing it for ages by then, but as soon as I stopped taking them I had stopped picking. Thats not to say I don't at all anymore.. in fact now that winter is almost done here...and finals are coming... I have noticed myself doing it more. Im ashamed of all the dark spots on my legs and arms. This last summer when I first stopped the meds, I went out. I didn't cover up anymore. I got a lot of comments but I mean, you can't really cover youself up in such mad heats. Im a tall young beautiful girl and those spots are god awful reminders of how I felt. I HATE how they look. Im always jelous of girls with smoothe looking skin. I went to the dermatologist and she said there was nothing that she could really do because the scars were all so deep. and I just cried. I cry about it a lot here and there.. but I used Bio Oil twice a day and it helps a bit. (Sorry this is so poorly written, I have a hard time getting what I have in my head out...) Picking is one thing, and im proud that it's not out of control anymore... but dealing with the scars is brutal. Im thinking about tattoos...lots and lots of tattooes.. I sorta had a point in there.... okay... maybe I just needed to rant
sho1234
March 28, 2011
Im also 19 and completely understand. I started doing it how u started, in middle school. I think if we target v smal things-we r making it imposible-stretching the small pores. Those cant be seen unless rele close anyway. If theres a proper spot i cut a piece of garlic and gently swipe over. 2 to 3 times a day. Very effective. Shrinks and helps rid of them. Also tee tree oil,a drop on cotton tip on either spot,blackheads work well. Stand bak frum mirror, dont look 2 close, look at skin as whole more. Zoom out when starting to focus on something zoomed in and opt for one of the methods above if anything-just not fingers, to destroy sumthing so smal which always leads to something bad wen we do it X x
htmk
March 28, 2011
I just turned 20 and I completely understand, I think I started to pick more once I got to college because of all the stress. For me I really struggle resisting the urge to pick so it helped me to cover up my mirrors and not give myself the opportunity to see what there is to pick. While that helped a lot I still have the wandering hands problem too where i'll be sitting at my desk doing work or something and my hand will just unconsciously pick around on my back and face I really need to find something else to keep my hands busy. I know it's hard when you're sitting there picking and your brain is yelling stop but your hands keep going but the most important thing is to keep trying and don't give up!
ri4821
March 29, 2011
My other issue is that I don't know how to keep my shoulders and chest and back clear of acne.. if there was hardly anything there to pick at, this probably wouldn't be quite as hard. I use a Salicylic Acid body wash that's intended to stop body breakouts, but it doesn't seem to be helping. Even when I don't pick at my skin, I still end up touching it or scratching my back or something... is that just working against the acne medication? Or should I try a new method of skin cleansing?
htmk
March 29, 2011
I hear you, for me that's the hardest area to resist picking because I don't need a mirror so I can do it anytime and no matter how clear the majority of my back is there always seems to be at least one whitehead that's just begging to be popped. Whenever I feel myself reaching for my back or shoulders I have to curl my hands into fists and mentally go over all the reasons I want to stop picking and even then it takes all my willpower not to. I don't know if you go to a dermatologist but if you don't I would highly recommend it, it's nearly impossible to keep yourself under control if your acne isn't under control. When I was younger my acne was terrible and even if I didn't pick it still would have been bad. One of the things my dermatologist had me use was prescription strength benzoyl peroxide (that it some strong stuff!) and that in combination with going on the pill (i don't know if you're a female or not but for me it seriously helped) dramatically reduced the amount of acne I had. Now I'm to the point where probably 90% of my acne is caused by me picking which gives me the motivation to stop because I know if I do that my acne will for the most part go away.
ri4821
March 29, 2011
Exactly! And sometimes I just end up scratching my back, even though it isn't really itchy, and I guess that's probably spreading oil from my fingers to my pores, making it worse. I think I have to stop that habit too. I don't go to a dermatologist.. I've never had awful acne on my face but it's starting to get worse on my body. I may have to look for one now, thanks for the advice. I just started the pill and haven't seen much of a difference... maybe I need to give it time? I've only been on it for a few days.
nomorepickingplease
March 29, 2011
give it a few months and you might see a difference! It really helped for me too but then I think it was affecting my moods so I just came off it two months ago after two years. I am hoping my skin wont get worse as a result! I identify with everything you said about picking - especially not letting yourself pick even one. Sometimes I just scratch my back and then I obsess for ages about whether or not I actually picked, even if I know I haven't. It's crazy.

Start your journey with SkinPick

Take control of your life and find freedom from skin picking through professional therapy and evidence-based behavioral techniques.

Start Now