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oaklandgurl , 04 May 2011

i pick daily and i need help!!!!!

can anybody offer any advice i pick and i pick and then i notice and when i do i try to stop but 10 seconds later my hands are back on my face, i dont remember how this started im 21 now and have been doing it since i was about 8 its ruining my life my boyfriend is so supportive but i can tell it bothers him if anyone has any ideas on wat to do i would be really gratefull please i am so desperate my own mother doesnt understand she just yells at me to stop picking and cant i control it
12 Answers
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PazzoBella
May 04, 2011
Hey oaklandgurl... welcome to the site! :) I haven't written on here in awhile, but I decided to login and see how everyone was doing, when your post caught my eye. Do you just pick with your fingers or do you use sharp implements too? I started a 21-day challenge of NO PICKING and I'm on day 18. My scabs JUST fell off today, as a matter of fact! So if you're willing to supply me with a little more info on your picking habits and possible triggers, I'd love to share with you what's been really helping me... depending on the day and situation, that is. Each day presents new challenges and, unfortunately, some days are easier than others. I'm looking forward to hearing back from you :)...
oaklandgurl
May 05, 2011
Pazzobella Thank u and everyone for ur support that's y I am so happy to have found this site. A little more info on the situation when I'm not working I constantly pick so being unemployed. Makes it a lot worse but I do use tools occasionaly to pick my face buts mostly my hands I don't have to be infront of the mirror I can be on the computer watching a movie riding the bus or train anytime I am in a bathroom. I do watever it takes to get the scabs
PazzoBella
May 05, 2011
Here are some things that have worked for me... I used to use tweezers to aid in my picking obsession. When I learned that this was a disorder about a month and a half ago, I FINALLY admitted to myself, after 7 years, that I NEEDED help. So I came clean about my picking to my fiance and gave him all my tweezers (and any other sharp implements I could turn to if I ever became desperate enough) and he disposed of them. I haven't worn ANY makeup since day 2 of my challenge and that helps in 2 different ways: 1) It's a constant reminder to myself every time I look into a mirror and see the irreparable damage I've caused to my face; and 2) It has allowed my skin to not only breathe, but the wounds were able to HEAL- this would've been impossible if I continued to cake foundation onto my face to "hide" the damage I'd caused, therefore, causing more clogged pores and potential breakouts to obsess over. I also keep my nails VERY short (to the point that they hurt if pressure is applied) and this has REALLY helped to prevent ANY sort of picking. ALWAYS keep your hands busy during the times you are most likely to pick aka when you're on the computer, watching TV, in a vehicle, and avoid mirrors whenever possible. If you need to use the bathroom and you're afraid that if left alone you'll start a picking frenzy, have a close friend or relative you trust come with. This involves you coming clean about your situation to those you trust most and letting them know that you can't do this alone and you REALLY need their help and support to get through this. You ALWAYS need to be mindful and aware (it's exhausting, but unfortunately, we pickers pick and don't even realize we're doing it half the time) and wearing gloves or socks on your hands will help not only serve as a reminder whenever you reach for your face, but it will also make it impossible for you to pick. Since I've stopped wearing makeup, I only wash my face once a day and I wash it while I'm in the shower so it's one less step I have to do in front of the mirror. When I get out of the shower, I leave the bathroom IMMEDIATELY and wait 10 min before finishing my regimen b/c I realized that after a shower, the FIRST thing I always did was head straight for my mirror. I've been washing my face with Neaclear Liquid Oxygen acne wash with salycilic acid followed with the Neaclear Liquid Oxygen facial toner and this has really been helping to prevent breakouts and even in the healing process with my scabs. Also, I follow up with mixing tea tree oil, jojoba oil, and fruit of the earth 100% aloe vera gel and applying it to my skin- this has also really helped my skin to heal and prevent new breakouts from forming. I take 1000mg of vitamin C everyday to speed up healing as well (plus a multi-vitamin for women and vitamin E) and I've been taking an herbal supplement called St. John's Wort for anxiety and depression (it's really helped to lessen the overwhelming urge I would feel to pick). Writing on this forum everyday has really helped me, and through it, I've learned a lot about this disorder and steps I can take to prevent it from taking over my life. Good Luck and I really hope I was able to help in some way! X
anonymous31894
May 06, 2011
this is really good advice and i'm so impressed you made it to day 18 with this regime! could you help me? I was doing so so so so soooo well and then one day has led me to 3 weeks of destruction and i haven't been able to pick stopping back up again and its so frustrating. i havent looked good in soo long, and when my skin isn't clear i don't like to go to the gym because i fear my make up sweating off.....i don't know if i can be as strong as you and do the no make up route, thinking about it now makes me cringe =/ help please.
PazzoBella
May 06, 2011
Hey there! Thank you so much for your comment- believe me, these past 18-19 days haven't been easy for me. My face was covered forehead to chin in scabs (the biggest one was about the size of a silver dollar!) Today was the first day I allowed myself to go out in public with just a small amount of foundation on (just enough to blend the red marks in with the rest of my skin)- I haven't stepped foot out of my house in 18 days!!! It's been really hard being stuck inside for so long, but it's what I had to do b/c I wasn't comfortable leaving my house without any makeup on. I just kept telling myself to let the scabs heal and fall off THEN a TINY BIT of makeup won't hurt. My skin is still FAR from "perfect" but at least I can wear a little foundation and look/feel somewhat "normal" again. I would LOVE to help you and be here to support you every step of the way :) Step 1- Are you ready??? Remember, ONE DAY AT A TIME... This is the key phrase to always keep in your mind. Every day you wake up, just think of it as a new day, a new challenge. Each day presents new challenges and some will prove to be easier than others. I've been an emotional wreck 9 out of the 19 days of my challenge where I'd just fall into a deep state of depression and feel like I can't get through this. BUT, I pushed through and I just kept telling myself that I was going to beat this and I REFUSE to let this take over my life and steal ANOTHER second away from me. If you're up for it, DAY 1 starts tomorrow and I will be on here everyday to help you through if you need me :)
ATSMITH
May 06, 2011
wow, your post has inspired me to try 3 weeks no picking. I tell my husband that I dont want to go out because I dont want to drive...The truth is, I dont want to go out and see women the same age as me who have clear, scar-less, beautiful skin...they can wear any shirt they want and it makes me feel very self concious of myself. Im only 22, I dont want to look like this anymore. I compare my skin to everyone else's and it seems like the more I do that....the more I want to pick. But like everyone elses posts...how can I make the people who put me down for it realize that I cant control this anymore. It's even causing problems between my husband and my parents, My parents blame him for it since it's been more pronounced since we got together, but marriage can be stressful (bills, kids, keeping house clean etc) whereas my husband is probably the most understanding, he's 12 years older then myself and dealt with addiction in his early 20's, so he understands how simply stopping a daily habit can be one of the hardest things you'll ever do. Do you think you'll continue to stop picking? My skin almost itch's if I think about stopping...does this make any sense?
ThisNeedsToStop
May 09, 2011
PazzoBella- you are such an inspiration. I am 15 years old and have been dealing with this since I was 10. I pick daily and I tell myself to stop, but can't. I feel so embarrassed walking into school the day after I did major damage to my face. I use different cleansers each day, but not just 1. I sometimes use up to 4. Especially after I stop picking- for some reason I think that the next cleanser will recorrect what I just did. And the thing is I don't have bad skin at all. I rarely ever break out. Blackheads are my problem; especially on my nose. Before I picked up on this disorder I used to pluck the hairs on my head, I believe it's called trichotillomania. The two disorders are very close. I also never wear nice clothes anymore- I always wear t-shirts because I think what's the point of wearing something cute, if my skin looks terrible? I've tried to cover my mirror with wrapping paper and stuff like that but I always end up taking it down. And like you, I use tweezers to pick at the scabs, even if they aren't ready to come off. This results in bleeding and scarring obviously. My skin used to be so much worse before though, so I think I'm making a little progress. In fact, I never let it get too bad anymore. I just wish I could stop for good.
Vendetta
May 04, 2011
I understand the stress escalating when your mum tells you to stop. I told my mum today that it was actually an OCD type of thing but she just nodded at me and said I should simply apply myself more. You must be able to hear me roll my eyes from here, haha. You can't make everyone understand, but the easiest way to explain (although I haven't tried this) would be to describe it as something that's like a walk in the park to try and relieve stress, except in the end your body looks like a minefield and it cannot be helped without a lot of support and encouragement. I don't even bother trying not to pick because I know my mum really has no idea about how my head works. >_<
sthepworth
May 05, 2011
Oaklandgurl and Vendetta- I'm a 38 yr old Mom and I UNDERSTAND!! I'm sorry your own Mom's don't but if it helps, there are a lot of Mom's on here that DO and we are ROOTING FOR YOU!! I have an intro on here. You should read it and see what my 14 yr old and I are trying (I finally bit my lip, swallowed my pride, and told my daughter (who does it) that I do it. It was the first time I have ever told ANYONE)
startexas
May 04, 2011
First line interventions (till you get to the root of the problem)*********************************If you do this in the mirror- take it down! I took the cabinet door off my medicine cabinet because of my worst relapse in years. It removes the temptation when you enter the bathroom/ bedroom. ***** Cut your nails off super short and file the ends smooth. It may not look sexy but they cannot do as much damamge this way !! ****** Resist temptation to OVERWASH and OVERTREAT your skin with too many products. "Dry" skin breaks out terribly as pores are tight shut with everything that the skin woudl naturally purge being trapped inside- creates more problems! :( Stick to a simple and effective cleansing, spot treatment, moisturize plan. See a dermatologist (tell them you "pick", its hard but worth it as they wont treat your skin as 'simple acne') and get assessed if needed. ******* Login and post here if it helps.**** Take it a day at a time *** When you are about to go at your skin: Remember that the pleasure of picking is never worth the pain it causes!!!!!
oaklandgurl
May 06, 2011
i found a couple of groups on face book but none of the have this type of community they r all about awareness not support. oh and i was really concious of my picking today and managed to only pic at 3 or 4 scabs over and over instead of all of them i also found one of my panda stuffed animals has like hand warmers so i am using that while im watching tv so my fingers arent available for me to pick
addimae
March 25, 2014
Oh my gosh, I totally just found this website and boy does it feel good to know that I'm not the only one out there with this crazy obsession. I've been squeezing/picking for about 4 years now. I didn't really realize it was a problem or disorder until last year. I'm only 16, and none of my friends hardly have to wear any face makeup, unlike me. I wear quite a bit and wouldn't be caught dead in public without foundation on my face. I don't have bad skin whatsoever I hardly ever break out but I never fail to find something. No matter how small, I have to squeeze or pick at it. Mainly black heads and clogged pores around my nose and chin. But I've created so many scars and bumps and my face is always bright red to where I don't even look like myself anymore. I can spend hours upon hours infront of the mirror squeezing and picking and I cannot control it. I have tried gloves, Turing off lights, taking out light bulbs, you name it, but I never follow through with it. I always find myself putting in the lightbulbs, Turing the lights back on, or taking the gloves off. I can't bear to look at myself anymore. I no longer feel beautiful. But I can't take it anymore. It is completely taking over my life, I dream of the day I can wake up and not have to worry about caking my face with makeup. I'm active with summer camps, going to the pool, spending the night out, etc. but it all gives me so much anxiety because I'm always worried about not letting anyone get a glimpse of my Naked face because im embarrassed. Half the time I'll skip out on doing fun things such as going to the lake with all my girlfriends because of how bad it is. I really need help and some accountability, because what I've been doing hasn't gotten me anywhere. And my parents don't know how to help me, they try but no one understands. So If anyone has any advice I would so greatly appreciate it!!

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