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Sandbox458850 , 05 May 2011

I'm losing my grip. I need help.

All the stress and depression is catching up to me. All I want to do is pick and sleep. Thinking about all the homework I've been putting off fills me with dread that usually leads to picking. Just earlier I saw my reflection and all the scabs and I had to pick. I just had to. About 15 minutes into it I realized what I was doing and I realized how exhausted I was but I couldn't stop. I finally broke down into tears, upset with everything. I feel so obsessive. All I do is pick. All I think about is picking. And ever since I found this website all I want to do is read other people's stories so I can feel like I'm not alone, like I'm normal. It's all finally catching up to me. I'm not ok, even though I tell people I am. I need help. There's really something wrong with me.
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lexyw
May 05, 2011
hey sandbox! i'm a student too and i completely understand. you are not alone, you just have to remind yourself of that. obvi this is a huge problem and there's no quick fix. but, student to student, i have two tips. first, when you're picking, actually say out loud "i'm picking." it might make you pause and think and maybe leave the mirror? second, tell yourself you can't pick right this moment. but if you do your homework for a solid ___ minutes (however many you'd feel good about), that you will allow yourself to pick as a reward. and then set a timer and let yourself pick for 2-5 minutes. and then start again. that way you get some homework done, maybe feel a bit better, and then don't feel like you've cut yourself off cold turkey. i hope this helps! i'm staring at some homework myself right now...good luck! hang in there!

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