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NiceOnTheIce , 12 Oct 2011

30 Day Challenge! Join In!

Any new members or returning members care to join me in a no-pick challenge? I am 20 years old and have been picking my face since I hit puberty. Picking my back came shortly after that, and my chest/shoulders after that. A few years ago I started picking the keratosis pilaris on my upper arms, and now I pick at my legs as well. My arms are definitely in the worst shape at the moment; they are easily accessible and you don't need to look in a mirror to pick at them :/ Anyways, I am just completely fed up with feeling self-conscious and embarrassed about my looks. Moreover, I HATE the feeling of being so helpless and out of control! So I was hoping that someone would join me in trying not to pick for 30 days. I tried this before and it worked great for a short while... this time I'm determined to stop! WE CAN DO THIS!
97 Answers
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empathy
October 21, 2011
I don't know if it's such a good idea to start from zero again. I'd try learning from your small relapse and promise yourself to try a little harder or with new strategies for the days to come. It's a little discouraging to start again every time you fail only for one moment. Why not take this 30 day as a time where you put extra attention to your picking and habits, and make every effort to stop it. Relapse happens and we can learn from them and get closer to our goals by doing so instead of feeling guilty about them and getting further away from our goal. What do you think? Is there anything you could learn from your relapse? Is there anything you could do differently next time a similar situation happens that would prevent you from picking?
NiceOnTheIce
October 22, 2011
You may be right, but I'm the kind of person who has to do everything "perfectly". So if I made it to 30 days just picking a bit every second day, I would feel like I hadn't really accomplished my goal. That would disappoint me more than re-starting and trying harder. And if I allow myself to pick a bit, what's stopping me from going overboard? Not a whole lot. Thank you for the advice, I know many people could benefit from it :) But I know what type of personality I have, and by starting again fresh I actually feel even more determined to quit.
empathy
October 22, 2011
Good on you for being so persevering and determined. Good quality you have there! Really I can feel the determinism, and we all need this. Make sure that this perfectionism of yours don't go overboard in your challenge though. It's a fine line. It must not demotivate you. Remember your greater goal, it's that one day, you'll stop this habit. It's hard to believe that we can do it perfectly today, otherwise, we would not need to do this challenge. It's just a thought though, you go on with your decision, just keep observing your motivation. You'll need some rewards or achievements one day. Make sure you have those along the way.
empathy
October 21, 2011
Here's a trick I discovered today that works for me; I pick a lot around my neck, chin and jaw line, so I wear a scarf and play a lot with it and instead of putting my hand on my face, I put it on the scarf, it's actually nice to feel my hand on my face without the urge to pick. And I always have something close to play with if I find I have the urge to do so.
lilith
October 21, 2011
I'm 59 years old, wish I could say I've licked this...but when I stopped picking my arms and legs at about age 25, I started to pick and eat my cuticles. The only thing that stops me is acrylic nails..for some reason, I will leave them alone. I wear gloves when I drive, out of site out of mind! I have the ugliest pointer fingers. I leave the rest of my fingers alone. I worry at my job that I appear weak and neurotic. I notice other co workers do the same thing. I don't really feel stressed out but I must be.
NiceOnTheIce
October 22, 2011
It's funny, one of my best friends in high school used to pick at her fingers/cuticles (still does, maybe) but I never really knew why and I didn't want to embarrass her by asking. Not that she would have had an answer, but at the time I never thought to connect it to my own picking. So you managed to quit picking your arms and legs... good on ya! It may have transferred on to your fingers, but that gives me an idea. Could you transfer your "compulsion" (or whatever you want to call it) to something else more healthy/productive? Maybe pick up a stress ball whenever you want to pick (like someone mentioned on this thread) or exercise everyday to relieve tension? I don't have a lot of ideas but if you integrate something else into your life to slowly replace the picking, theoretically you could quit!
Frustrated_Picker
October 23, 2011
Hi Everyone! I'm new to this group...its really nice to be able to have someone to talk to about this problem. I'm 28 years old and I've been suffering with obsessive skin picking since I was 10!! :o( It hasn't always been a serious problem. I used to pick at my legs and somehow (I have NOOO idea how), but somehow I just stopped picking at them, so my legs completly cleared up and they're perfect with no scars or anything. However, for the past 10 years or so, I've been obsessed with picking my arms and back. I've been going to a cosmetic dermatologist for the past 3-4 years because I get acne on my back. I've spent sooo much money on medication, but it really hasn't improved much, because I can't stop picking the scabs and even the healthy skin. I'm horribly embarassed by this problem, so I've never shared it with my family, friends or dermatologist. I went to a therapist 2 years ago because I had performance anxiety with school and she diagnosed me with severe anxiety and ADD/ADHD. I take Adderal when I'm studying or going to class, so I can focus. I also have Xanax, but I only take a very small dose, on rare occassions (i.e., taking a test or making a presentation, so I'm more calm). I never even told my therapist about my skin picking, because I'm so ashamed by it. I'm going to join this 30-Day Challenge and hope that I can make it. It's pretty hard, because alot of times, I dont realize that I'm picking (i.e., it may start by just rubbing my back after a long day and then I unconsciously search for a scab to pick at). God, I sound like a psycho! :o( I hate this sooooooo much!! I hate having to hide my arms and back!! I hate not being able to wear sexy strappy clothes like other girls!! I'm an attractive girl, but I often have low self-confidence because the skin picking makes me feel like a monster. And people never understand WHY I have low self-confidence because they dont know that I pick my skin (my family knows but they dont know the extent of it). :o( Anyways, I'd reallyyy appreciate it if someone would respond to my post, so I dont feel like I wrote all of this out for nothing. And if anyone has any advice, I'd love to hear it!! Good Luck to everyone taking this challenge on!! I know I'll need some help and support on my side, so hopefully we can all be there for each other!
NiceOnTheIce
October 24, 2011
My first piece of advice for you is to read through this feed and check out all the others, and I'm sure you'll learn something! You sound A LOT like me, (I guess we all sound like each other :P) especially the part about spending so much time/effort/money on getting rid of the acne but nothing works because you can't stop picking. Quitting is always the first step, and the hardest one, but as soon as you stop picking your skin immediately begins to improve, acne or no acne. Also about not telling ppl about it. Everyone thinks Oh, she has really bad, inflamed acne on her face/back/chest/wherever, and that sucks. When in reality, it's the compulsive picking that makes the acne look 10 times worse than it is. For most of my life I hid my problem (I didn't really understand it but I still felt embarrassed enough to hide it). I recently told my boyfriend of 2 years about it, and he has been very supportive of me. He grabs my hands when I start picking in front of him, and he compliments me when I do well. I feel so much better now that I feel like I don't have to hide, even if it's just from one person. And obviously, this site is a great way to connect with other ppl who are going through the exact same thing! What else... oh yes, we all have the problem of unconscious picking! Even before you can stop picking, you must make it a conscious thing. That way, you can physically stop yourself from doing it. Just try to be aware of your hands at all times, and when you feel them moving towards your skin, do something else! Grab a stress ball or brush your hair or rip paper or doodle, whatever! And even if you don't catch yourself picking every time, take your hands away and purposefully stop, as soon as you do (no matter how much you want to keep going!) That is the point of this feed, it's a goal for everyone to try and achieve! So good luck, keep us updated :)
animator_1
October 23, 2011
Hi to all! I just found this site and literally cannot believe how MANY other people have this same soul-destroying, time consuming and day ruining problem! I almost feel like I want to cry because I'm not alone in this after all. I have suffered from this since I was about 11 and started to get the normal few spots - 22 now and over that time I've moved on to my upper arms, breasts, shoulders and, hate to say it, genitals. I cannot cope anymore with the shame and disgust I feel after I've picked or eaten, I really thought I must be a real freak. I don't go as far and don't get the infections I used to - so the very small voice of optimism in my head is telling me that I must be gradually getting better. But I can't trust to that to make this end, and right now, that's all I want - but I know that just one tired evening or morning, the 'correction' of just one spot can so easily lead to the demolition of all my problem areas, undoing all the hard work id've achieved in days or weeks of abstinence in a stupid, senseless half an hour. I need something like this to talk to other people who KNOW what this is like - the fact that you cant simply 'just not do it'. I have only started to admit (or try to explain) my problem to close friends and my mum in the last couple of months, but I really can't expect them to understand because they don't have it - it's an addiction! Even when I finally tried to talk to the GP again about it, she didn't really seem to get it and looked at me like I was a wierdo. If youre doing this 30 day challenge, well then I am going to try my very best to be motivated with all of you and do it too. Knowing that other people are out there trying as hard as I am to resist this stupid stupid thing is going to help, I know it! Some of the posts I've read here have really affected me - I know that 22 is not very old but I refuse to let this dominate my life any longer. I can't describe how bitter I feel when I see a cool T shirt or lovely dress that I know I cant wear even with my arms slathered in foundation, or when friends or even people on TV complain about how their issues with their normal-skinned bodies are affecting their relationships with all those gorgeous guys, I want to just scream 'You have NO idea!!!' I'm lonely but I havent been able to go near a bloke since I was 18 and actually dread the idea of meeting someone because of the thought of showing my skin. I struggle to maintain a healthy weight, but I can honestly say I'd gladly be two stone heavier and swap it out for good skin I don't feel drawn to every time I look at it. Thankyou so much to everyone who's posted about what they're going through on this site. I cant let this continue to dictate what I can and can't do in my adult life. so you're on, this is day 1 of 30!
doodlebug
October 25, 2011
This is day 1 of 30 for me also. I'm 30 and have been picking for ten years now, but for the first four I didn't even realize it was a problem, I just thought I had pimples. For the past six I've been trying unsuccessfully to stop, sometimes I can go a few days, but then, of course, I just have to scratch off something on my face and then I end up sitting in front of a mirror demolishing every pore in sight. My face right now is just embarrassing, and I feel ashamed just to get out in public. BUT, for the good news, I AM going to beat this and my husband has gotten on board to help support me. He actually took down the bathroom mirror so I wouldn't pick, put the full length mirror in the hallway and taped the lights in the off position (so I can see my outfit but not have enough light to pick), he is going to watch me any time I wash my face since that's when I pick the most, especially when I wash my face in the shower, I spend half an hour just going over the surface of my skin with my fingernails and scratching ANYTHING that's raised whatsoever off, and I have plastic gloves sitting next to the bed that I will put on as soon as I wake up and only take off if I'm in public (even in the car I'll wear them, because I scratch in the car), and take them off when I go to bed. I know this might seem drastic, but really, I'm SO sick of picking and feeling so guilty and ugly, and I know that nothing else has worked, so I'm just being honest with myself and acknowledging that only drastic measures will work at this point and I'm willing to do it since I don't think anything else will work. I know you're young and believe me, you don't want to be 30 and still dealing with this, so just deciding to stop sometimes isn't good enough because your brain is constantly sending signals out to pick. Try wearing gloves as much as you can and cover mirrors. Oh yeah, a neurologist told me that I need to look in a mirror and go over my face with my fingers but NOT pick, so I'm going to have my husband watch me while I do this, because God knows I would pick if he weren't there watching me. Doing that kind of retrains your brain to touch what it is you've been touching and picking but without the picking. So, anyway, I'll check in with you and see how you're doing, and you can do it!
NiceOnTheIce
October 25, 2011
Sounds like a foolproof method to me! The "drastic measures" will work great for the first part when you can't fight the urge to pick, they will physically stop you from doing it! And later on, when you become more aware about it and a little more in control, you can return mirrors one-by-one, wear the gloves less, etc. Am I right? I also think that idea about going over your skin in the mirror with your fingers but not picking is a wonderful idea. Thanks for your story, very inspiring :)
doodlebug
October 26, 2011
Thank you :) I made it through day one, and it was hard not just take off the gloves and pick, but I didn't do it!!! I knew if I did it once I would always do it, so hopefully by the end of the 30 day challenge I'll be more in control and won't have to wear the gloves so much. I tried going over my skin by myself but had to bring in my husband to watch me because I just knew I was going to cave, he's been very supportive, but I think it's an important part of retraining my brain to touch my face without picking. I hope you're doing well with whatever picking problem you might be having as well.
NiceOnTheIce
October 25, 2011
I know how you feel. I wish I could just slather pro-active or some other "miracle" skin treatment all over myself and make myself pretty and confident like the actors on tv. Even just being able to wear those revealing tank tops would be good enough for me! (sometimes I do, but rarely ever in public. I'm soo self-conscious and I try to keep my hair long to cover my back/shoulders. I layer up my arms with foundation too but that doesn't really help...) So you really want to stop; now you've got to make that happen. Check out other feeds and try to gather up some ideas to help you quit! It's one thing to really want it (we all do!), it's another thing to follow through with a plan of action, and stick to it! Good luck, keep us updated :) And remember, we're all in this together!
karenp
October 25, 2011
I have been trying to complete a 30 day challenge for months now... the longest I have lasted is 5 days... I am inspired that others are accepting the challenge... gives me encouragment to keep trying.... let me know how everyone is doing....
secretskin
October 26, 2011
Hi Karenp, I've never managed more than 3 days.... tomorrow is my day 3 (again) ... this time I don't want to do it alone, which is why I'm here, and on my blog, for support. We can do it if we spur each other on!!!
empathy
October 25, 2011
Well, I had a relapse again and I seem to slack my determinism a little. So I make the engagement again to continue on this challenge, persevere and give it my best, I don't want to spend any more time to this habit, I'm tired of it and it's stopping now. It's not a a light engagement I take this challenge seriously. The impact on my life is great and I will gain self-confidence, assurance from it. If only to be proud of myself, to gain time and control of myself, it's all worth it. I can do this, we all can. We don't need this in our lives. It's a stupid habit, we can conquer this, control our compulsion and be calm, controlled, satisfied and confident. Let's persevere everyone, we're on the right track. I feel like I'm closer to the end of this nightmare then ever before. By the end of this 30 day I will have get rid of the strong compulsion. I will be in control. I will love my skin and treat it gently and lovingly all the time. Hope it's going forward for all of you. It's not easy, but it's worth it. Imagine being free of this...
NiceOnTheIce
October 26, 2011
Feeling stressed as I study for a difficult exam, and wearing a t-shirt. My arms are in full view as I write/type and the spots are so perfect for picking now... it's sooo hard to resist! It hurts, looking at those perfect little bumps, touching them, but not squeezing them. Just had to let you all know what I'm feeling right now, because if I keep it to myself I'm afraid I'll go nuts. Now, there's no way I'll give in :)
doodlebug
October 26, 2011
I know EXACTLY how you feel when you say something is "perfect" for picking! I've just completed day 1 of the challenge and I've wanted to pick all day!!! I'm a face picker and won't even meet up with friends at this point because my picking has been so bad lately, but today I wore plastic gloves all day while in the house and driving and only took them off while I was visiting family. I even made my husband watch me the whole time I was in the shower so I wouldn't pick, since that's when I usually comb over my face with my fingers and pick off every little thing. So, I'm happy that you didn't give in, I don't know what day of the challenge it is for you, but I'm glad to have made it through one day!!! You can do it!
Chickpea
October 26, 2011
I'm behind on most of the posts...but i'm officially joining this. I want to feel strong, smart, sexy and beautiful, and this terrible habit only makes me feel small, weak, and disgusting. I've made huge progress ever since i admitted to myself this is a problem, but i relapse and still have urges to scratch and search for imperfections. I have to stop, and allow my skin to heal at its own pace... Remember, you are not your skin, your skin is not you. You are so much more than whats on the surface. So don't be so hard on yourself, and we can get passed this, and allow our skin to heal. Today is October 26th, and I am starting this challenge :)
secretskin
October 26, 2011
Hi, I'm definately in for the 30 day challenge, I've just decided to conquer my skin picking once and for all. Please help support me and each other!!! I've set up a blog, to help me work through this, if any of you want to work through it with me then go here: http://secretskinpicker.wordpress.com/ You are right WE CAN DO THIS!!!! :-) x x

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