Online Test

Find out the severity of your symptoms with this free online test

Take the test
soembarrassed , 08 Aug 2012

Ruining my face

I am 40 almost 41 and for the last 3 years have been destroying my face. Any little bump i pick at until I am left with an open wound. These wounds used to heal fairly quickly now they take months. They start to heal and I CANT STAND THE SCAB OR FLAKES OF SKIN so of course I pick at those. I really need to stop this as now I am starting to get scars, which then I pick at thinking if I can get that little raised uneven skin picked off then problem solved - no more scar. That is not the case. You then have an open wound all over again that starts healing with scar and all. I cant tell you how many times I have called in to work with one excuse or another as I am too embarrassed to be seen. I have even gone to lunch and picked and called in some "family emergency" that I have to go take care of as not to return. I cant stand the feeling that there is a spot light on every little mark. I constantly watch people's eyes to see if they are looking at my marks. This is so ruining my life. I never want to go anywhere. Cancel plans all the time. My friends tell me I am being parinoid that you cant even tell there are marks on my face. Who do they think they are kidding? I have mirrors (which I look in at least 100 times a day) I can see them, so I know they can. I really dont know why I started doing this. The best I can figure is when I started seeing this guy and felt that I HAVE to have perfect skin or he would not be interested. I know this not to be the case as scabby marks or not he always wants to do something with me. I cant tell you how many times I have backed out of plans with him just so he wouldnt see the mess of my face. I am at a lost on what to do. How to stop. How to heal. I really dont want to spend the remainder of my life with band aids on my face at night trying in vane to heal the mess I have created. Any tricks you all have on healing these nasty marks, or stopping the urge to pick would be greatly appreciated and welcomed.
289 Answers
Add Comment
soembarrassed
August 17, 2012
Ok I am going to try to beat that habit as well as this skin picking issue I have. I think looking (or checking the mirror constantly for imporovement or even worse that it has gotten worse) is making it harder to stop. I used to be able to walk past a mirror without a second glance - now I cant pass up a mirror or for that matter anything that has a reflection. So I left my compact in my car before going into work. I will only go to the ladies room when necessary. I usually go in there what I swear is every 10 min. My co-workers must think I have bladder issues lol. If only that where true lol. I just need to get through the next 9 hours. Then hopefully this weekend will be a major healing. Wont have to put makeup on until Sunday for my brothers wedding. That should be fun as self-conciesous (spl - sorry) as I am feeling. What should be a fun time will probably have me hiding off in a corner. Today starts a new day. I have makeup on today which I think draws more attention to it - but it makes me feel a little better that it is not all red and scary looking....lol! Good luck to all you guys today and may you have a pick free day!
soembarrassed
August 17, 2012
Ok I have caught myself looking in the mirror 10 times already and I have only been to work since 7. I just told myself too "STOP you are only making yourself feel worse" so it is 9:00 am and I am not looking in the mirror again until I get home!!!
soembarrassed
August 17, 2012
Ok today this thing is raised a little no longer flat and it is shinny. Does this mean it is healing? Should i be concerned. Doing ok not looking in mirrors today. Caught myself a couple time. Actually when you stand back from the mirror you can hardly see it. So what do you guys think? Is a scar developing? I hope not as it would be a pretty big one about the size of a pencil eraser.
soembarrassed
August 17, 2012
Have not picked since 2:30 yest afternoon. But the dang thing is just asking to be picked! It is a dried up mess. I just got home washed my face. Looked in the mirror...oh my gosh gross..reached for the tweezers...thinking i can fix this...then immediatley put the tweezers down and left the bathroom. I will not give in!!! I am hoping this scab will fall off sometime between now and sunday. Please oh please. So day 2 here i come!!
wantalife39
August 17, 2012
Hello me again, Been on this site for the last 3 hours!!! But havent picked so thats all good. I have just re read you blog about for like the 3rd time and what stands out to me is the comment you made....."this is so ruining my life" I am 39 so close to your age...and it has dawned on me..you and I are pretty much half way thru our lives. Being a smoker im probably a little further down the road. So are we gonna spend the rest of our lives that we have left saying "this is ruining my life"..."i never want to go anywhere"........" I dont want to spend the rest of my life with bandaids on my face"...girl we have to just stop this shit and take control. Just on a funnier note....your job must be loosing a bit of money in wages with you in the bathroom all the time...giggle...we gotta laugh sometimes. Do you have a support person at work...??
soembarrassed
August 18, 2012
I totally agree. Lol they are not losing money as I am a csr for a phone company and lucky me I have a wireless head set... so i can answer the phone where ever I am....lol I also smoke which at our age I think is delaying the healing. I think we need to kick this habit too. The only thing is sometimes when I get the urge to pick I smoke instead either is not good. Ok we are from this day forward taking control. Right now I have one hell of a scab...just screaming...pick me! Pick me!! But I have told the damn thing to bug off and leave me alone. I have gone since 2:30 yesterday with no picking...that is a very big accomplishment for me! I hope I can hang in there!! I do have a friend at work who tells me like it is...if it is looking bad she wont lie to me. She. Usually tells me it is not noticeable and she wouldn't lie to me. She also tells me stop looking at it when she catches me. So she is a big help.
goal orientated
August 18, 2012
I had the same shiney large scar on my chin earlier this week. It developed as a raised bump from the scab and when I peeled it on three occasions it started to develop a new skin every time, over and over. I then got the message. I ignored it just for two days before picking it again veryyyy gently. At present it has heeled in to a faint brown scar which is good enough for me. Hope yours also speeds up but this time without the interruptions that I put my skin through habitually. Xxx
soembarrassed
August 18, 2012
Goal orientated. Thanks so much for easing my mind. If is not shiny today and a little more flat. Really dry and scabby. I am going to leave it alone today. I have been putting calamine lotion on it which actually seems to help. I am going to keep applying it and leave on with even doing my errands today...lol this should be fun. I am hoping by tmrw it will just kind of fall off. I have a wedding to go to sunday afternoon and really hope it comes off by then. I have not picked at it or messed with it for 48 hours!!! That is a new record for me! Now my goal is 24 hours. We are all going to beat this addiction. Everyone of us! I know it. Everyone on here is so helpful and supportive and is really helping me
wantalife39
August 18, 2012
Morning everyone, Well I did it!! I have NOT picked for 62 hours. I started off with 4 just red marks from old small sores, and 4 healing spots (a little crusty) and 2 pretty good ripped apart ones. Got up this morning, looked in the mirror and hello they have fully healed. I dont beleive it. Its amazing how fast the skin heals when left alone. What I decided to do was just watch them see how they heal and what the actual process of the skin is. The one on my chin stayed dry and crusty the whole time but nothing over the top, not overly raised or anything. The same with the one on my nose. It was happy to just to dry up. Then there was what I thought was an old scar, however it had obviously had some puss still in it and it wanted out. So I left it and watched it about 4 times. I was amazed how the skin worked, Within about 3 hours it had brought all the puss to the top. Oh how i could have squeezed this. (It was sssooo small though, now that i look at it. (Last week it would have been the biggest thing ever), so off to the shwer when I got out it was just gone. The body had expelled it itself and I had just washed it off. Im a very proud of myself and have just proved to myself that I am more than capable of doing this. A new small lump turned up last night and I didnt touch it once. (I only noticed this when cleaning my face in the shower). Less than 10 hours and the lump has just gone. It was pretty straight forward. Since I have stopped picking or even just touching my face I believe that I have stopped moving germs, infection from one place to another. And I know that I was creating at least 90% of them myself just from touching. I dont even have acne prone skin. I have noticed though that the one on my chin is actually been caused by the way I smoke. I am right handed and when I bring the smoke to my mouth my third finger hits that spot over and over. I say that the nictone is getting in and causing the infection or even adding to the infection. So I am very aware of this and have cut my smoking from 20 cigs to 5. (everyday is different!! whole other issue) lol There is a couple of what appears to be small white balls under the skin on my chin and they dont bother me. I know they are there and maybe once a day I will check on there progress. i am interested to see if the body will try to expell them or will the just dissapear...I shall keep you informed. The biggest trick for me...was wearing my latex gloves!!! They truely did work for me. I am very small...5ft..43kg and would say that I would run on Nerves for a bit part of my day...so when I start to pick it seems to be a nervous thing. (not in the nervous to see the school principle...just the feeling of constantly moving etc.) and this comes to the fore hard and fast at night...when I try to be still. On come the gloves till bedtime and the rest is history. I did count on the second night that I tried to touch my face at least 40 times!! 30 times the night before. Could you imagine if my fingers had made contact with my skin!!!!! What a damn mess that would have been...!! Well so far so good.... I have to say soembarrassed.. that about 6 times during yesterday I thought of you at work back and forth to that mirror and your struggle and it really seemed to keep things in check. Just the thought that you could all see me...funny but it worked.!! Thanks everyone for the support...see you all 2 nite.!! xxxxx
soembarrassed
August 18, 2012
Day 2 so far so good. No picking it is early yet though. Got up washed my face little flakes came of around the edges by themselves though...which i think is good..still a good size scab..pretty dry and a little brown looking. Will keep applying calamine this does seem to help keeps the itching at bay. Plus with the pink lotion on my face i can write it off as a bug bite....well in my mind anyway...while doing my errands today...lol
soembarrassed
August 18, 2012
Whoop hoo the scab came off. Looks a lot better. Little pink. I think I have a scar :( this I will live with as a reminder of what picking does. I am going to start using a scar cream and hopefully that will minamize it. I am going to try not to be self conscious of it as at least....finally it is healed. You guys I am telling you calamine lotion I think is what finally helped. For 3 nights I put a globe on. Yes by the 2nd night it was dried up and scabby...but this afternoon the scab just rolled off. Any of you have any suggestions for scars. I have areas with little ones that are not of much concern....but this one is a little bigger and a little more noticeable.
goal orientated
August 19, 2012
Yay success :) and many congrats on seeing it through with full determination. Right, you know I said I have approx 5O scars, well today I noticed they were all very faint! That was an unexpected glance. Bio oil always works on my scars though the reviews swing both ways. I used to use it as a night treatment, and plan to start it up again when I stop feeling irritated by the hot nights here these days. Also being fussy about my long hair doesn't help. A more clinical product is Strivectin spot treatement which is a £45 pen that only has positie reviews. Brought it. Yet to use it.
soembarrassed
August 19, 2012
Do you think vitamin e oil would work as well as the bio oil? I am sticking to my new routine. Still looking in the mirror only long enough to wash...dry...treat and moisturize. Then I am out of there. Any longer and I am afraid I am going to find something that needs to be picked. So far 2 days no picking. Shooting for day 3.
goal orientated
August 19, 2012
Well some people claim that it is the massage action that helps the scar fade, whilst using vitimin E oil. I have never used it despite having it in the house, but I know people like it to maintain healthy skin overall. For scars, i opt for something stronger. Will need to research that one.
soembarrassed
August 19, 2012
I have a scar cream i am going to try. I am sitting here thinking "seriously missy so what you have a few scars. So what. It could be worse. You could have cancer...be paralized..be homeless...so many other things. And here you sit all poor poor me with a few little scars" Right so i have just berated myself when things could be so much worse. Other people out there have had much worse things happen to them and they make the best of it and move on. So i am going to try really hard to change my outlook on life and be a better person.
SadSAM
August 18, 2012
Hi Im 33 years young and this skin picking is taking over. Its is such a bad habit. I wake up picking,talk on the phone picking, go to bed picking. I think my issue started with nailbiting then I realized if i get my nails done I wont bit them......Well that worked for nailbiting however it made me start picking. Over the last ten years I have been dealing with this issue. I thought I was a nerve condition like anything stressful will trigger my to bite my nails or pick. Just glad that Im not alone thanks for this site.
soembarrassed
August 19, 2012
Day 3...no picking. No spots to pick yeah trust me i have analized every inch of my face looking. Not happy about my scar but am hopefull it will fade over time. Looking forward to the wedding today since i no longer look like a train wreak...lol 27 more days to reach my goal. So far so good. Have a good day all!!

Start your journey with SkinPick

Take control of your life and find freedom from skin picking through professional therapy and evidence-based behavioral techniques.

Start Now