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Noscubs , 14 Sep 2009

personality traits of skin pickers?

Hello! I think it would be interesting to know the personality traits of you skin pickers, if there could be any similarities that could help us understand and overcome our problem. It hasn't have to be really serious stuff, just things you find troublesome in your lives. Starting with myself, fear has been a major theme in my life. These are problems I have or have had: - Hypochondria, mostly for brain "illnesses" - Identity crisis, for example related to gender identity - Sexual fears, for example compulsively searching for signs that my boyfriends are pedophiles :( - Fears of being watched. As a child I was convinced that people stared at me, and I thought there was something special/weird about me... :o I often feel really uneasy when people watch me, at times I don't want to look people in the eyes. - As younger, fears of my thoughts being read - Guilt OK, I sound like a total wacko... It's not as bad as it sounds. :) But I would be really happy to know more about your personality traits!
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Noscubs
September 14, 2009
Oh, and then I have such problems deciding and chosing among stuff. My friends keep laughing and joking about that (in a loving way, thankfully). It is in a way similar to picking, I can stand in a shop for ages, knowing that I want to "break free" and get away from the horrible environment - children screaming and the narrow corridors and way too much peolpe - but still being unable too decide what bread I should have, picking one up, putting it back, taking another one, and so on. I often read all the contents and prices and so on, but I just cannot find the perfect product, not even the best one. Often I just give up and decide not to take the product at all... I waste so much time on this and on picking! It's like an involuntary hypnosis! If I rent a movie, I would prefer to scan through all the movies before starting the decision-making process. At first, my company has ideas of which movie to rent, the second stage is "OK, whatever will do", and finally there's a frustrated "We take this movie now!". (So then I can blame my friend if the movie's all crap! Smart, huh? :)) This "problem" is just stupidity and vanity, but quite humorous too, in a way. Anyone sharing this ridiculous trait?
Becca
September 16, 2009
I also feel like its a waste of time to get in the car and even attempt to go to the grocery store. I know what's there its not like very much has changed...but when I go there I have no idea what to get. I also go with by boyfriend and is patietn to an extent and then gets aggravated with me b/c I wonder all over the store. Sometimes I have a list and sometimes I have tons of coupons to use as well...other times I go and pick up the same stuff...knowing that that's not what I want to eat but I force myself to eat it so I don't waste money or go hungry because that's what I bought. Again, I'm glad I'm not the only one who does this...Yeah I get picked on too...I know they sometimes only mean it to be joking and I have built up a tough skin to it but when it just seems to keep rolling on and on it tends to dig into that thick skin & really upset me. Then I feel like I have anger issue but I don't really what they say just pisses me and I have no way to release it. Yeah you would think my boyfriend would stick up for me but most of the time that is not the case unfortunately. Thank you Noscrubs for posting all of this!!!:)...I am seriously glad I'm not the only one feeling these ways...:)
thecrankyone
September 23, 2009
I've been diagnosed as bipolar II, I also have asthma, anxiety issues, and a weight problem. I've been picking my scabs as long as I can remember. I go thru periods where I am fine, and periods where things are totally out of control
Becca
September 25, 2009
Could you tell me more about your Bipolar II? I am interested in this...If you do not want to share that is okay too. I have always wondered if I were some what of that... You can post it on here or go to my thread entitled "pick...pick...pick......pick...pick...". Thanks for sharing.
thecrankyone
September 25, 2009
I'd be happy to share. Bipolar II is very similiar to bipor I, or manic depressive. the main difference is it not as extreme. I have many periods where I'm so depressed I can barely function. Since being medicated its not nearly anywhere near where it used to be. I used to get so low, I couldn't do anything. I'd even go days without showering. Than I would rebound. Sometimes to a period of normalcy, sometimes to a period of being almost high (but only on my own brain chemicals) going for days w/o sleep and not stop moving. I used to joke, that is was the only time I'd get anything done. It also affected my thinking and my moods in general. I didn't just get angry, I'd get a rage (often over small things), occasionaly escalting to borderline out of control. I remember standing at the top of the stairs just screetching at my ex. He was/is a jerk, but my behavior was way over the top. I tend to over-feel a lot of things. Where as others might be happy or sad at cerain news my pendulum swings way wider. I've had issue such as this since I can remember. But it wasnt' until my late 20's I was diagnosed. It took me years after that of on again/ off again doctoring to finally find the right doctors (both a p'doc (meds) and a councilor) that could help me (I was also much more ready). I currently take, ativan, celexa, Lamictal (my little miracle) and trazodone (for sleep at night). I also take a few other meds right now due to my skin becomming infected, possibley with scabies (great for a picker/scratcher). I have a lot of anxiety, (caffiene makes it worse). The worse it is the more I scratch. Sometimes it calms enough that I can go periods with out picking. Right now I have a lot of things going on, which is makign it worse. If you have any questions I'm more than happy to answer them.
Noscubs
September 27, 2009
Thank you Cranky for the post! It is so interesting hearing about everyones personalities! For me, it somehow helps me understand my self too! Please tell us more if you feel like!
Noscubs
September 14, 2009
I'm sorry I'm having this monologue, but I just came to think of that it is like I have a lack of will power. Sometimes I have problems moving because I can't gather the will power needed to get my limbs in motion. I may not be picking, but still being unable to break free. For example, I may be lying on my bed or sitting in a chair, just staring. Or writing on my computer like now. :) Right now I'm like a baby refusing to go and brush it's teeth. What I need is a dictator forcing me into that bathroom... Uhm, am I just a natural born slave, incapable of taking any initiative whatsoever? No, really I would prefer to being the master of my own body, but I am not! My body won't just obey me... :(
Becca
September 16, 2009
I CAN TOTALLY RELATE!!! I feel like I have to get someone else to get me to go brush my teeth..I just got braces off back in June...I was so good when I had them on but now it i feel like I just don't have the energy to move. It's like the simplest tasks to do (ie brush teeth, brush hair...even get something to eat or drink)...I told my mother I wasn't trying to be lazy on purpose I just don't feel like moving. I'm glad I'm not the only one...thanks for this post:)!
Beth
November 18, 2009
I have the same problem: I feel like I don't any willpower. I seem to do better if I can get myself in a routine, then it's like my body can follow a known pattern and it's not so much effort. (Right now I'm trying to exercise first thing in the morning before work every other day). I think picking is the same way, its a well worn path that your body just does automatically. I guess the only way would be to replace it with some other routine, but I haven't succeeded yet!
marioninmontana
September 18, 2009
I really believe that you are right! I have some similiar personality traits; such as fear; this sounds crazy, but I have a fear of being attacked or raped, it's brought on by taking a shower when noone else is home. It's so weird! Ihave been picking my skin since I was six, off and on, and now I'm 49! That's a long time! I also have a fear of growing old and not having my own house (we rent now) and not having enough money to survive on. I am very sensitive about things; especially the c.s.p. I work in retail and about six weeks ago an customer called the store to complain about my "open sores"! They are so retarded! They thought my sores are contagious! They are so flippin stupid! So, one of the asst. managers solution was to have me wear long sleeves or 3/4 sleeves or cover my arm with a huge bandage! I have been sweating for the last six weeks because I can't let the ones on my arms heal! Sometimes, I really hate myself. You hang in there and please go the Dr. and also get a conselor; they really do help!
ocdFreak
February 15, 2010
oh my gosh i feel so bad for you!! That must be so humiliating!! Strangers complaining about you 'open sores' as if they are contagious or something! Wow some people really have no shame at all! I mean, I understand that some people might be frightened of unfamiliar things and situations but come on!! I am sorry you had to go through that nonsense...that must make the situation a lot more stressful! I kind of wish that counselors did not cost so much. Talking to people on this site though really helps more than I thought it would. Especially when people respond with acceptance and first hand experience with what we're going through..
jacquie
March 24, 2010
aww! i work in retail too. a year or so ago during my review, my boss approached me about picking my scalp when i was out on the sales floor and zoning out. i was humiliated. it really made me realize how much people must see me acting crazy. that just added a new anxiety to my list. stupid retail.
chibidots
September 20, 2009
I have a huge fear of being watched constantly. I'm so convinced I swear there's someone stalking me constantly, video taping me or taking pictures of me. It makes very scared all the time. I feel people in general are watching me, judging me, or thinking thoughts I don't want them to.
crystalizedangel
September 22, 2009
I'm insanely sensitive and I've been sucidal. I'm also jumpy, nervous, and antisocial.
bcbggirl
September 26, 2009
It's actually nice to hear someone else with "weirdo" thoughts. When dating I often would look for signs of the guy being a ped. And I mean it would worry me sick at night laying in bed. That was a long time ago. Sometimes I can't look in to peoples eyes. I get two totally opposite thoughts in my head....1. They are going to find a flaw on me and they are going to think I'm gross 2. They will think I am pretty but I don't deserve those thoughts so look down or away. That is totally bonkers!!! But it's been for most of my life. I had addiction problems for 10 years and went to rehab for 2 months. I was still picking in the bathrooms there. I'm clean now...2.5 years but the picking has GOT to stop. I am missing out on my life by wasting lots of time. I don't know how. I never thought I would be able to quit taking drugs but I did. Now I need to find a solution for this. It makes me hate myself. I have also been told I am extremely sensitive to critisism. I have gotten much better by not focusing on myself so much, but it is a trait I still have.

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